Monkey’s Market Minute: January 15th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- As we prepare to go to war with Iran entirely for the benefit of Israel, and potentially trigger World War 3, for absolutely nobody’s benefit except the Jews, let us remember that oil prices will go parabolic and cause mayhem in the bond market.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/treasuries-will-increasingly-take-cues-oil , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/want-destabilize-iran-rest-assured-something-worse-will-follow , https://www.zerohedge.com/energy/crude-stocks-rise-most-two-months-us-oil-production-finally-drops

- Trump appeared to have second thoughts about Iran, indicating that the executions had stopped, causing oil prices to tumble, but Trump will attack Iran. Juden Vult! The Jews will it!
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/military/us-withdrawing-some-personnel-qatar-air-base-over-iran-threat , https://www.rt.com/news/630976-reuters-us-attack-iran-imminent/

- If the US successfully destroys Iran, it’s going to be hell for the oil industry. If the US is unsuccessful, World War 3 may occur, as Iran will destroy Israel, likely triggering the Samson Option and nuclear exchange. There is nowhere to go but down from here, but the die is cast.

- Silver is ripping, now over $100, which I didn’t think would happen this soon, and that’s despite the manipulation by the banks. They were supposed to keep silver below $75, but everything is too volatile, and there is no alternative in commodities thanks to all the manipulation and bullshit. The government caused all of this. Biden manipulated markets to cover up the inflation he was causing, and Trump did it to help support Israel’s wars. Now the bill is coming due.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/commodities/whats-going-silver-goldmans-commodity-desk-chimes , https://www.zerohedge.com/the-market-ear/silver-has-left-building-vol-broken-ratios-are-crashing-bubble-alarms-are-screaming , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-producer-prices-come-hot-heels-mysterious-energy-cost-surge , https://www.zerohedge.com/the-market-ear/gold-keeps-ripping-bubble-signals-and-dollar-gap-are-flashing-red , https://grok.com/highlights/a0791336aed7418ba42dc96fb9040b35

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. Bitcoin
o 3. Crypto
o 4. Consumer Staples
o 5. Gold
o 6. Bonds
o 7. Real Estate

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Natural Gas
o 2. Consumer Discretionary
o 3. Brent Crude Oil
o 4. Information Technology
o 5. Broad Commodities
o 6. Agriculture Commodities
o 7. S&P 500 Index

- Metals and crypto are up while stocks are down. The whole “digital gold” narrative is holding up despite all the volatility last month. Whatever.

- The only other update for geopolitics is that there is currently no carrier strike group in the Middle East, so an attack on Iran won’t happen tonight. There is a carrier moving from the South China Sea to the Middle East, so the war will probably begin when it gets there. China or North Korea could do the funniest thing right now.

- The bottom line is that we’ll just have to wait and see if the US and Israel have some fancy new weapon they didn’t have 6 months ago, if they go straight to nukes, or if Iran pushes their shit in. We’ll find out together.

Monkey’s Market Minute: January 8th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- I want to address something from the show today before we get started. I laid out three possible scenarios: BRICS cucks, WW3, or horse trading, but I dismissed BRICS cucking for multiple reasons. Halsey actually thinks that’s what’s going to happen. Despite BRICS winning the war, they’re going to watch the regime expand further into their territory, while they basically are “allowed” to keep what they started with, and they’re going to do this because they’re afraid of the US and don’t want WW3, oh and Iran is going to be overthrown and abandoned even though the opposite happened 6 months ago for good measure. We’re living in an opposite world where the losers in a war seize territory from the winners because they’re afraid that the people they defeated for absolutely no reason.

- The US seized the Russian oil tanker, and although the Russian military was in the area, they didn’t do anything. This doesn’t mean Russia and China are cucking, but Russia hoped that merely being there would be enough to dissuade the US from crossing this red line, but they were wrong. Since Netanyahu’s visit last week, the US has turned a page and is now going for it, which Russia and China were not expecting, as avoiding WW3 was the standard for both sides... until now. Both Russia and China have issued similar statements, and they’re not the normal denouncements; they’re warning that the US has gotten arrogant and they need to be shown that Russia/China are not afraid of them. It doesn’t sound like they’re going to cuck to me, but we’ll see if Halsey is right (he’s not). BTW, I like picking Halsey’s brain to get the Regime side of the issues.
source: https://www.rt.com/news/630699-us-seizes-oil-tanker/ , https://united24media.com/latest-news/russian-official-threatens-military-retaliation-including-nuclear-response-after-us-seizes-oil-tankers-14833 , https://x.com/i/status/2008942069067468835

- Nothing to talk about in the markets. Metals are up, and energy is excited about the seizing of Venezuelan oil, because it’s a bailout by the taxpayer. Trump has already said that taxpayers are going to pay the energy companies to get Venezuela’s oil, so it’s free money.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/metals-mania-continues-mag7-lags-2026 , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/top-goldman-trader-warns-were-early-stages-reflation , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/chris-wright-takes-venezuela-pitch-oil-executives-miami , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-may-subsidize-oil-giants-rebuild-venezuelas-energy-sector-trump-says

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Natural Gas
o 2. The VIX
o 3. Healthcare
o 4. Bonds
o 5. Agriculture Commodities
o 6. The US Dollar
o Everything else was down.

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Utilities
o 2. Crypto
o 3. Industrials
o 4. Bitcoin
o 5. Materials
o 6. Financials
o 7. WTI Crude Oil

- The “America, Fuck Yeah” euphoria seems to be dying down. Counting on Russia and China doing nothing and letting you steal everything from their trading partners because they’re afraid of you is also titanically retarded.

- In geopolitics, regarding Iran, they’re not stupid. They know Israel is preparing to attack them, and they know Israel and the West are funding and instigating the riots; they’re signalling that they may not wait for Israel to attack them first, because they’re not benefiting. Iran wasn’t doing anything, and there is no “international law” any longer. There’s no point in being worried about optics when the US and Israel are openly trying to overthrow you. Does this mean that Iran is going to attack Israel? Probably not, but they could, and they probably should. We’re in the eternal “we’ll see”.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-signals-pre-emptive-action-after-sen-graham-israeli-threaten-khameneis-life

- So the bottom line is that we’re waiting for the next shoe to drop, but the shoe will drop. Israel will do something soon, I can feel it in my foreskin.

Monkey’s Market Minute: January 6th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- It turns out I was right. My only mistake was underestimating the intensity of Trump’s dick-waving. I assumed that Trump would pound the table and threaten Mudoro, who would give up and agree to give Trump the oil he already promised him back in October, and Trump would declare victory. I didn’t think he would actually go into Venezuela to stage a massive kayfabe attack and kill dozens of people, but that’s what happened. Let’s cut through the propaganda together, shall we?

- Moduro’s government is still in power. Moduro was taken, but Trump isn’t putting the opposition leader chick in power to be a puppet; Moduro’s government is still in power, just without Moduro himself. Trump likely insisted on taking Moduro for the photo-op, but notice that he was smiling and giving thumbs-up in pictures. He cooperated, and there is confirmation of a stand-down order, which is why none of the helicopters were shot down. It’s not that the Russian and Chinese weapons didn’t work; they weren’t used.
Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-VTdtb5O6CY

- Remember that Trump himself admitted that he wants Venezuela’s oil, which Maduro offered in October. The attack was just for spectacle, and it’s fucked up that dozens of people were killed, and I’m sure bribing everyone wasn’t cheap either. Now that Maduro is out, rival factions are beginning to emerge. Like I said yesterday, those who thought it was over were retards who were clearly not around during Iraq, where we went from “America, Fuck Yeah” to 20 years of occupation for nothing.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/regime-tweaking-not-regime-change-what-us-just-achieved-venezuela , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/who-delcy-rodriguez-maduros-deputy

- Trump is threatening Mexico, Colombia, and Cuba, but we’ll have to see what happens. It’s likely just Trump talking shit, but maybe he keeps the momentum going by bribing a few more governments into letting him win. There is also evidence that the regime is pivoting away from Russia and China, which would be further evidence of horse-trading. The Regime is going to let Russia and China win in their backyards, but South America belongs to the Regime.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trump-puts-three-more-latin-american-countries-notice-cocaine-mills , https://www.politico.com/news/2026/01/05/venezuela-operation-pentagon-shift-away-china-00711296

- Someone bet $37,000 on China taking Taiwan this year on polymarket. This bet came from a brand new account with no prior history, and is possibly an insider. This could be further evidence of horse-trading.
source: https://www.casino.org/news/someone-just-placed-a-massive-polymarket-bet-on-china-invading-taiwan/

- Furthermore, Trump has resurrected his demand to annex Greenland from Finland, which is a NATO member. Why does the US need Greenland if Finland is a NATO member? Because NATO isn’t going to exist much longer, but the US wants to control Greenland to have more access to the Arctic to counter Russia and China up there. This is further evidence of horse-trading. NATO will fall, Taiwan will fall, and the US will abandon its empire and focus on the Americas. Unirnicallly, this is exactly what Trump should have done as soon as he assumed office, not a year later, but better late than never, I guess. Consolidating the empire in its decline is the smart move. It would have prevented the Roman Empire from collapsing if they had pulled the legions back and consolidated in Italy rather than trying to hold the empire together and getting picked off one by one. Even if the Jews lose Israel, they’ll be set up in South America, so while the Regime still loses and their empire is fucked, it’s not a complete Roman Empire-style collapse, more like the Soviet Union collapsing.
source: https://www.cnn.com/2026/01/05/world/analysis-trump-venezuela-greenland-nato-intl-latam , https://www.theatlantic.com/national-security/2026/01/greenland-trump-venezuela-nato/685511/ , https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/jan/05/trump-must-give-up-fantasies-about-annexation-says-greenland-pm

- The dollar is still going to continue to be dumped, and you should behave accordingly. As NATO collapses, and with the loss of Asia, nobody is going to buy America’s bonds any longer. There will still be hyperinflation and economic collapse. Crypto can’t save the regime any more than than $1T platinum coin idea from 2023. They plan on replacing the collapsing demand for bonds by central banks with stablecoin companies. That’s their only plan.
source: https://www.nytimes.com/2023/02/02/business/trillion-dollar-coin-debt-ceiling.html , https://www.brookings.edu/articles/a-trillion-dollar-coin-would-compromise-the-federal-reserve/ , https://www.worldfinance.com/special-reports/the-great-big-stablecoin-bet

- Copper is surging. All the metals are surging, and it’s not hard to see why. Even if the regime and BRICS do a little horse trading, the dollar is fucked, and with the futures market fake and gay, you need physical metal. With gold and silver already high, it’s copper’s turn. Copper is also not a precious metal, and it is fairly cheap, so it’s unlikely to be as manipulated as silver and gold.
source: https://m.economictimes.com/news/international/us/copper-price-rally-today-why-copper-reached-an-all-time-high-above-13000-a-ton/articleshow/126359907.cms , https://www.cnbc.com/2025/12/30/copper-prices-what-next-for-the-red-metal-as-lme-prices-hit-record.html

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Crypto
o 2. Bitcoin
o 3. The VIX
o 4. Gold
o 5. Energy
o 6. Financials
o 7. Broad Commodities

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Natural Gas
o 2. Utilities
o 3. Consumer Staples
o 4. Healthcare
o 5. The US Dollar
o Everything else was up.

- The “America, Fuck yeah” attitude is making people think that the economy is going to be great because we captured Maduro, despite that meaning nothing. There’s no reason for crypto to be rallying, so it’s probably another pump and dump cycle to shake out those still using leverage.
source: https://www.investors.com/news/bitcoin-price-venezuela-cryptocurrency-prices-oil/ , https://finance.yahoo.com/news/bitcoin-climbs-three-week-high-044546315.html?guccounter=1 , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/bonds-stocks-oil-gold-crypto-jump-dollar-dumped-amid-maduro-mayhem

- There’s nothing to talk about in the markets that we haven’t already talked about. The economy hasn’t changed since last month.

- So to summarize, here are the things we’ve confirmed:
o Maduro cooperated, and his government was bribed/paid off to allow the US to take Maduro without (much) bloodshed.
o Trump is moving to take Greenland and abandon NATO, very likely as a horse trade with Russia to not interfere in South America.
o A massive bet was placed that China would take Taiwan this year
o Gold, silver, and copper are surging
o The fall of NATO means nobody will buy US bonds anymore, except (hopefully) stable coin companies.

- Here’s what we’re waiting to confirm:
o Is Iran, Colombia, or Cuba going to be attacked? This is unlikely since the only times the US military can win is when its opponent is paid to dive. We’re the Jake Paul of military superpowers.
o Are Russia and China going to abandon South America? This will be hard-proofof a horse trade betweent he regime and BRICS.
o What about Israel, Gaza, and the Middle East? If the Regime cedes Asia to BRICS, Israel is done. I don’t see BRICS letting the regime keep all of the Americas, Europe, and the Middle East while BRICS keeps what they started with after winning. That’s not how war works. The Jews can flee to South America, though, so it’ll be fine.

- The bottom line is that we know a little more today than we did yesterday, but we’re still waiting for confirmation on some other things and for hard confirmation of horse trading between BRICS and the regime. We still don’t even know if the regime can hold onto Venezuela. The coup attempt in Iran has utterly failed, but Israel could still try to launch a decapitation strike against the government again. As I said before, the die has been cast. No point holding back now.

Monkey’s Market Minute: January 5th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- There is a lot of propaganda to sift through regarding Venezuela. From what I gather, the people cheering for the removal of Maduro are exiled Venezuelan refugees. The ones in the country don’t want to be colonized by the US and have their oil stolen, nor do they want that female puppet that won the peace prize to be their new leader. They are supporting Moduro’s vice president as the acting President. Trump is going to have to commit boots on the ground and invade Venezuela, Iraq-style, if he wants to take it over and steal all their oil and gold. However, it could be performative, and maybe the existing government cut a deal, and they’re not serious about resistance. We’ll have to see how this develops, but those who thought Venezuela was over are retards. We defeated Saddam Hussein’s government in 3 days, but then we spent 20 years and trillions of dollars (not to mention thousands of lives) trying to turn that country into our vassal and failing.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/political/cuba-venezuela-china-and-americas-left-wing-connection , https://www.i24news.tv/en/news/international/latin-america/artc-zionist-attack-venezuela-s-acting-president-blames-israel-for-maduro-seizure

- Oil markets are tanking because Trump and Rubio have already indicated that they plan on unleashing Venezuela’s oil onto the market to crash oil prices and hurt Russia. However, I believe this is overblown. It will take months, probably the entirety of 2026, in order to get Venezuela’s neglected infrastructure rebuilt and begin shipping out oil at full capacity. This is a threat to Russia’s economy, but the danger isn’t imminent.
source: https://www.businessinsider.com/russia-economy-oil-price-worst-year-since-pandemic-2026-outlook-2025-12 , https://fortune.com/2026/01/04/venezuelan-oil-production-rebound-lower-crude-prices-long-term-pressure-russia/ , https://x.com/KobeissiLetter/status/2007954193605091407

- Bitcoin is up today, with crypto rallying. The propaganda that what Trump did in Venezuela means “America is back” and that the good times are here again is likely responsible. Nothing has changed in the economy.
source: https://www.coindesk.com/markets/2026/01/03/bitcoin-dips-but-quickly-recovers-as-venezuela-s-maduro-captured

- In geopolitics, we don’t know what really happened in Venezuela. According to official reports, Moduro was considering voluntarily “turning himself in, but the CIA also supposedly had people inside the government. It doesn’t matter at this point because unlikein Syria, there are people in Venezuela who are organized and not enthusiastic about being colonized by the US and having their oil given to American companies, but again, it could all be performative. We’ll see.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/how-maduro-was-caught-completely-surprise-us-raid-after-cia-team-weeks-monitored-his

- So far, Russia and China’s only response is to demand that the US release Maduro and condemn what Trump did, but they actually need to DO SOMETHING. If they don’t, their trading partners iranwill abandon them out of self-preservation (because if Russia/China won’t do anything to protect them from the US, why join BRICS?) Without BRICS, Russia and China will be economically isolated and be sanctioned until ZOG can bribe insiders to help them overthrow the government. Russia and China will be broken up and its government replaced by puppets, and that will be the end of them. Playing passively and being diplomatic will be seen as a weakness, which is what Trump desperately needs to happen. There are people on Chinese social media calling for the government to take Taiwan using the same template as Trump in Venezuela, but China would do better to focus on the US military bases all along their border, and not Taiwan and its people specifically. They have to do something, but what will they do? We’ll see.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/russia-china-demand-us-immediately-release-venezuelas-maduro , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/chinese-social-media-explodes-us-invasion-venezuela-template-move-taiwan

- In Iran, the whole “peaceful protest” nonsense has ended. The rioters are now getting into firefights with machine guns. Some people are saying that a coup is imminent, but these are essentially Antifa terrorists who are being funded and armed by the regime, not an organic movement of the people. However, the regime may try to launch an attack on Iran soon before their asset is completely used up, in the hopes that if the military is busy defending itself from armed rioters, Israel will get a clean shot at another “decapitation strike” against the government. With the extremely provokative attack on Venezuela, they have nothing to lose. China and Russia are going to respond anyway, so might as well escalate and “go for it” against Iran as well. I don’t know what Israel hopes to accomplish against Iran’s missiles this time. Maybe they’ll just nuke them right off the bat and just see what the world does about it.
source: https://x.com/MyLordBebo/status/2007908228425028028 , https://x.com/IranObserver0/status/2007796958145191957 , https://www.yahoo.com/news/articles/thomas-massie-warns-trump-iran-212707038.html , https://www.yahoo.com/news/articles/netanyahu-expresses-solidarity-protests-iran-185512361.html

- So the bottom line is that we’re still digesting what happened in Venezuela and how BRICS will respond to it. Trump’s plan is very high-risk, low-reward because it relies on Russia and China cucking to avoid WW3, which they haven’t done before, and they just tried to assassinate Putin by drone-striking his house last week, so I don’t think Putin is having any of this. Meanwhile, it’s not at all clear if Trump can even hold Venezuela without an invasion, which will require Congress, and could turn into another Vietnam. The next shoe to drop will be the regime attacking Iran, or Russia and China doing something. The die is cast.
source: https://www.rt.com/news/630522-us-facing-second-vietnam-venezuela/

Monkey’s Market Minute: January 2nd, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing much is happening in the markets except silver is already recovering quickly from the manipulated crash earlier, with paper silver going back ove $72 while physical silver is trading for over $100 in Asia. I expect the western price to be maintained around $75 maximum until the supply runs out and the US Navy begins its pirate runsto prevent South American suppliers from selling to Asia. Drink up me hearties yo ho.
source: https://thesilverindustry.substack.com/p/silver-price-in-tokyo-hits-130-per

- Markets were closed today due to New Year's, and since normies are shying away from Bitcoin, we may not have a “normie indicator” for when the markets are closed any longer. However, for what it’s worth, Bitcoin was down today, so markets may be negative tomorrow.

- In geopolitics, we have movement on all fronts:

- China is moving its tankers to Venezuela, daring the US to stop them. This is very ballsy for China, which usually plays things very safely, which is telling. If China is going on the offensive instead of playing defensively, it’s only because they know they will win under every plausible scenario.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trump-xi-showdown-emerges-chinese-tankers-press-ahead-venezuela-despite-blockade

- Also in Venezuela, the US attacked the port using a CIA drone to avoid the anti-air defenses. Trump is saying that it caused a “major explosion, but there are no details, so it was likely a soft target without defenses, and Trump is talking shit and waving his dick around still.|
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/cia-drone-carried-out-first-known-land-strike-venezuela

- In Iran, we’re now on the 4th day of protests. These protests are a psyop. The government of Iran is at no risk of collapse whatsoever. The violent riots involve a few hundred people, not thousands, as the media is claiming. They’re basically like Antifa riots, surely Western-backed, given the convenient timing. The government has begun taking lethal action against the riots, and they’ll be put down soon. The moderate president tried to be reasonable, but the rioters actually killed an IRGC official, so that’s when the gloves came off.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-grinds-halt-several-killed-wounded-including-irgc-member-amid-raging-protests , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/final-battle-iran-protests-spread-prices-surge-currency-hits-record-low

- To put the nothingburger of these riots in Iran in perspective, the protests against Netanyahu in Israel were far larger back in 2024 and 2025, and lasted a lot longer than a week. The whole Iran thing is a psyop, and possibly a setup for a false flag. If the Israeli deal was rejected, Israel is going to try to drag the US into a war against Iran for them because they have no chance of winning otherwise. Based on these events, the Israeli deal may have been rejected by BRICS, but that’s speculation on my part.
source: https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cn95x2vlv8ro

- The Somaliland issue is 100% about Israel and containing Yemen. It’s not about BRICS specifically, just Israel. China is condemning it because it sets a precedent for the US to create nonexistent countries to seize land from nations to build military bases on by buying the loyalty of a tribe or two instead of engaging in diplomacy with the country as a whole, but realistically, the regime won’t survive long enough for these military bases to be used. This is pretty much the last desperate gasp of Israel trying to flex its control of the Regime, but it’s already been defeated, and the economy is dogshit. It will take years for the US to manufacture the weapons to rearm Israel, and that’s time Israel doesn’t have. They should probably sweeten the deal they’re offering BRICS instead of going down this road, but whatever.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/china-condemns-israels-recognition-somaliland-taiwan-embraces-move

- So the bottom line is that the sudden nature of this Israeli offensive leads me to believe that Israel’s offer was rejected by BRICS, and this is them escalating and activating what assets they had available, but they don’t have the time or money to do anything impactful. This is just kind of sad at this point. We’ll see what China does if the US Navy attacks their shipping vessels. China simply can’t abide piracy of their trading partners, so we’ll see how this plays out. Will the boomers double down and lose another war? Probably. This realistically won’t end until the boomers die one way or another.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 30th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- In the markets, metals and stocks fell, and … bonds rose? Bonds? Why? Commodities make sense due to stagflation, but bonds?
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/precious-metals-puke-bonds-bid-stocks-give-santas-gains , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/futures-drop-silver-slides-record

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. Natural Gas
o 3. WTI Crude Oil
o 4. Brent Crude Oil
o 5. Energy
o 6. Bonds
o 7. Real Estate

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Gold
o 2. Broad Commodities
o 3. Materials
o 4. Consumer Discretionary
o 5. Crypto
o 6. Financials
o 7. Information Technology

- Today was a reversal day with folks taking profits and/or covering short positions. Don’t expect this to last.

- In geopolitics, Ukriane tired to assassinate Putin by attacking his home with drones. It failed. Meanwhile, Russia has taken 30 towns in December alone.
source: https://www.rt.com/news/630214-ukraine-attack-residence-putin/ , https://www.rt.com/russia/630210-lavrov-failed-ukrainian-attack-putin-residence/ , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/russia-confidently-advancing-ukraine-over-30-settlements-captured-december-putin

- Trump and Netanyahu are still talking shit about a war with Iran, but there’s nothing to discuss here. What happened to Venezuela? Are we memory-holing Venezuela?
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trump-bibi-meeting-us-will-knock-hell-out-iran-if-nuke-sites-rebuilt , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/us-land-strikes-venezuela-campaign-began-last-week-no-one-knew-it

- The bottom line is that nothing really happened today other than position covering after the COMEX reacted to the silver squeeze the other day. There’s nothing else happening in the market or geopolitically, and the year is essentially over. January 1st, China’s export controls on silver kick in, so that should be fun. Other than that, we’re still in “we’ll see” mode as we’re stalling for time.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 29th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The silver shortage has been confirmed, but silver fell due to the futures exchange emergency regulation changes. Metals are a long-term hedge, and not something you should be watching day-to-day and day trading, but I’m here, so we’ll be watching the silver market more closely going forward.
source: https://x.com/Barchart/status/2005439828922622201 , https://x.com/barkmeta/status/2005436618149069184 , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/bitcoin-bruised-boxing-day-bonds-bid-precious-metals-rip-new-records , https://x.com/KobeissiLetter/status/2005452517954768925

- The CME Group, the company behind the COMEX, has suddenly changed its regulations today, automatically liquidating speculators and stealing their money, as well as imposing a $25,000 margin minimum in order to prevent retail investors from squeezing silver higher. This caused silver to fall to $73. I warned you that the government would steal investors’ money like they did with nickel. I guess the only thing that prevented them from acting earlier was the Christmas holiday, but everyone is back to work, and the markets are still rigged.
source: https://www.thehindubusinessline.com/markets/gold/bullion-market-pads-up-for-silver-thursday-as-cme-group-raises-margin-cuts-limits/article70443588.ece

- Paradoxically, the stock market thinks record high silver prices is bullish for AI despite silver being used extensively throughout AI datacenters due to it being the best electrical conductor. How is it bullish? Because this will force AI companies to spend more money on data centers since they require silver, but how is that bullish exactly? That’s like saying inflation is bullish because everyone is spending money on everything.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/sp-futures-trade-record-high-precious-metal-surge-accelerates

- The winners in the market today are:
o 1. Natural Gas
o 2. Broad Commodities
o 3. Gold
o 4. The VIX
o 5. Materials
o 6. Bitcoin
o 7. Consumer Staples

- The losers in the market today are:
o 1. WTI Crude Oil
o 2. Brent Crude Oil
o 3. Crypto
o 4. Bonds
o 5. Consumer Discretionary
o 6. Communications Technology
o 7. Financials

- If they manipulate the price of silver down, there won’t be any supply. The mines will have no investment to dig for more silver, nor will stackers have a reason to sell their silver. The price literally needs to rise for the people who need silver to make stuff, to get it. China’s export controls begin January 1st. Are they really just going to keep manipulating the price until the silver runs out? Ooooookay.
source: https://www.ainvest.com/news/china-2026-silver-export-controls-implications-global-supply-chains-strategic-metals-exposure-2512/

- In geopolitics, there are peace talks in Ukraine and Israel threatening Iran, but who cares? I’m more interested in North Korea suddenly having its first nuclear submarine. This allows North Korea to strike any target it wants, and North Korea can do what Russia and China can’t do.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/kim-jung-un-issues-new-year-message-putin-sharing-blood-life-death-same-trench , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/zelensky-meets-trump-mar-lago-ukrainian-capital-pounded-russia , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trump-awaits-netanyahus-war-pitch-iranian-president-says-israel-us-already-waging-full , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/netanyahus-new-slant-lure-trump-war-iran

- Lastly, China has made an unexpected move by broadcasting military simulations which show Chinese naval vessels protecting South American (i.e., Venezuelan) shipping and driving the US Navy to the Gulf of Mexico. Again, China never does this, and while they’re just broadcasting a simulation, this shows China is considering taking action if the US continues to aggress against Venezuela. It’s worth pointing out that China buys 81% of Venezuela’s crude oil, with the US ironically coming in 2nd at 17%. Let me also remind you that Russia is actively in Venezuela, arming them and providing military support. I don’t think war will happen, but maybe this will be the signal that Trump needs to stop waving his dick around and just take the deal he was offered in October to leave BRICS alone in exchange for an oil deal.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/chinese-military-simulates-caribbean-war-scenario-amid-trumps-gunboat-diplomacy

- So the bottom line is that silver “crashing” to $73 represents the government changing the rules and stealing investors’ money when they lose, which is why I stay out of the futures market these days, but it does literally nothing to alleviate the very real supply shortage in silver, which can only be alleviated by allowing the price to rise, but that will cause a banking crisis, so they need to keep silver at $75 or below until we hit the wall at full speed. There doesn’t seem to be a plan here, just more manipulation to stall for time. Time for what? The boomers to die, I guess.

The markets are closed tomorrow, but here is a sneak peak at the new 2026 TFM Show intro.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 23rd, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing is happening in the markets. Everyone is looking forward to 2026.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/sponsored-post/you-can-be-lazy-week-your-gold-shouldnt-be , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/what-watch-bullish-investors-head-2026-record-low-levels-cash

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. WTI Crude Oil
o 2. Brent Crude Oil
o 3. Gold
o 4. Crypto
o 5. Materials
o 6. Industrials
o 7. Financials

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. The US Dollar
o 3. Real Estate
o 4. Consumer Staples
o 5. Bonds
o Everything else was up.

- Oil is up because of the “war” with Venezuela, but this is classic stagflation signaling.

- The only thing happening in geopolitics is that France is reaching out to Russia to have new talks since Europe is being shut out of the talks with the US. Europe is desperately trying to remain relevant, but they have absolutely no leverage whatsoever and nothing Russia wants, so what could it offer? Will they sell out the Regime before Israel does? Is that what’s going to happen? Now that the game is over, everyone is trying to sell out everyone else at the last minute.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/macron-seeks-new-talks-putin-forces-alternative-path-stalled-us-negotiations

- The bottom line is that nothing is happening. Happy birthday, Jesus.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 22nd, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing is happening in the markets. It’s the end of the year, and Christmas means the week will be shortened. Ain’t shit happening.

- In geopolitics, Israel is beginning to stir shit up with Iran again for seemingly no reason. Does Israel really want to start another war with Iran? No, of course not.
source: https://www.timesofisrael.com/army-chief-hinting-at-potential-new-iran-war-says-idf-will-strike-wherever-required/ , https://www.jpost.com/israel-news/defense-news/article-880954

- What’s going on? IMHO, this is Israel cutting its deal. I expect Russia to act as a mediator and ensure Israel’s security to bring peace between Israel and Iran. All of this is 100% performative. Israel lost, and their empire is crumbling, and they’re cutting a deal, but can’t appear weak in front of the Arabs, so they have to threaten and stomp their feet until Russia brings both sides to the table, and Israel agrees to knock off their genocidal bullshit and Iran pinky-promises not to destroy them when America can’t protect them any longer. That’s what’s going on, I’m calling it now.

- What is Russia getting out of this? Expect the Ukraine war to end shortly and abruptly. It’s the end of NATO and Europe. The Jews will prevent Europe from crashing the bond market; it’s the end of the Regime. Israel can’t allow the Regime to collapse before it has cut a deal with BRICS to ensure Israel isn’t destroyed. It’s kind of surreal watching the Western world sacrificing itself for Israel in real-time isn’t it?
source: https://www.politico.com/news/2025/12/21/ukraine-russia-miami-florida-talks-00702453 , https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cn5lnzlvqg2o

- So the bottom line is that the empire is collapsing and nobody even realizes it. The deal for Israel is the final act of the Regime, to sacrifice itself to ensure the survival of Israel. Jews will probably flee the sinking ship of Europe and America and go to Israel as the countries sink into stagflation and hyperinflation. What happens next depends on how the civil war goes and who comes out on top, but that’s a worry for another day. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 19th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- After yesterday's sell-off, the markets recovered when the UAE joined the AI circle jerk, investing $100B into OpenAI.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/did-abu-dhabi-just-deliver-santa-rally-openai-raise-100bn-sovereign-wealth-funds , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/futures-rise-ahead-cpi-report-central-bank-bonanza

- China successfully reverse-engineered the lithography machines that the West uses to make advanced chips. All of the sanctions and bullshit were to prevent China from obtaining this technology because if China could make chips as advanced as the West, there would be no stopping them, and... it just happened. What does this mean? It means that China won. They didn’t just win the AI war, but they will corner the entire computing market because they can now produce chips on par with Nvidia for a fraction of the price, because it’s China.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/chinas-manhattan-project-builds-secret-euv-chip-machine-long-blocked-west

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Information Technology
o 2. Consumer Discretionary
o 3. Communications Technology
o 4. Utilities
o 5. Industrials
o 6. S&P 500 Index
o 7. Bonds

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Natural Gas
o 2. The VIX
o 3. Bitcoin
o 4. Brent Crude Oil
o 5. WTI Crude Oil
o 6. Broad Commodities
o 7. Consumer Staples
- I was expecting Trump to announce more bailouts, but Trump convinced the UAE to bail out the AI bubble instead. What did we offer the UAE in exchange for this? Who can say? This could be the next chapter in the saga, but it’s all a stalling tactic and nothing more.

- In geopolitical news, the US looks like it’s accepted defeat and will embrace the multipolar world. There is talk of ending the G20 and G7 and having the C5. The C5 (or Core 5) will be the US, China, Russia, India, and Japan. Notice Europe is out; they don’t matter anymore. Why is Japan there? India and Japan shouldn’t matter either, but the US doesn’t want Russia and China to outvote them, and Japan is seen as a reliabl ally, which gives India the deciding vote, and India likes to play both sides, so the hope is that the US can still get their way by limiting the influence of BRICS by limiting BRICS to only 3 countries, and adding Japan to the group for no reason whatsoever. This is a good compromise for BRICS and shows progress, but it’s a pretty blatant attempt to replace BRICS with a different organization (the C5) that the US can have disproportionate influence within. However, let’s give the boomers credit for actually thinking for once and not just stubbornly doubling down on their failed wars. I’m proud of you.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/c5-would-be-pragmatic-format-managing-global-systemic-transition

- Perhaps as one more act of defiance from the Regime, they approved the largest arms package for Taiwan ever, giving $11B of weapons to Taiwan. Of course, the weapons don’t exist, and this is nothing but an attempt to create leverage against China.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/us-approves-largest-taiwan-arms-package-history-over-11bn

- There are also reports that Chinais relaxing rare earth controls, which probably means all this Taiwan stuff is theatrics. BRICS won, the Regime is finished, and now they’re negotiating the terms behind the scenes.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/china-begins-granting-general-licenses-rare-earths-trade-tensions-cool

- So the bottom line is that a lot happened today. The most impactful thing was China quietly winning the tech war with little fanfare. The end of the Regime is upon us. This isn’t good news for Israel, but they’re focusing on making sure the Right purges people like Nick Fuentes and Tucker Carlson for questioning their control, but it’s nothing a little hyperinflation won’t cure. I expect Israel to cut a deal with Russia and China soon. The end of the Regime is huge, and as far as the C5 goes, it’s a stupid idea, but the US is going to want to have more influence in the multipolar world, and they’re overestimating their influence over India. India wants money, and as the dollar crashes, so does the US’s control over other countries via money.

- So basically, the wars may be wrapping up soon, but the fun is only getting started. Once the Regime collapses, the inflation will begin, which will only stop when the government is replaced. Even when the Regime is no more, and the world can breathe again, we still have to remove these fucks from power, take women’s rights away, and start rebuilding the West again from its foundation. Lots of work ahead of us.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 18th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Democrats are going after AI datacenters because they raise electricity prices. That’s the issue Democrats are gearing up to run on in 2026, apparently. Not the corporate welfare and securities fraud, but AI datacenter energy use. While it seems stupid, it caused the stock market to dump, crypto to dump harder, and silver to rally.
source: https://thehill.com/policy/technology/5651358-democrats-tech-giants-data-center-electricity-bills/ , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/data-center-drama-wrecks-tech-silver-soars-amid-crypto-chaos

- In energy news, oil rallied in preparation for Trump’s announced speech, expecting a declaration of war against Venezuela, but nothing happened, and oil fell again.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/crude-benchmarks-higher-following-report-new-russian-energy-sanctions-markets-await-address , https://x.com/KobeissiLetter/status/2001480170377486730

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. WTI Crude Oil
o 3. Brent Crude Oil
o 4. Energy
o 5. Broad Commodities
o 6. Gold
o 7. Consumer Staples

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Crypto
o 2. Information Technology
o 3. Bitcoin
o 4. Industrials
o 5. Communications Technology
o 6. S&P 500 Index
o 7. Consumer Discretionary
- Trump needs to announce some new bailouts to keep the bubble inflated. I’m not sure what he’s waiting for.

- In geopolitics, Russian military personnel have been confirmed to be present on Russian oil tankers in case anyone is thinking about doing a little piracy against Russian vessels. No word regarding Venuzeula though.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/uniformed-armed-guards-spotted-russian-shadow-fleet-vessels-europe , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/putin-denounces-lie-hysteria-russia-threatens-europe-conflict

- The bottom line is that the only surprise today is the Democrats going after the AI bubble over energy prices and not the fact that it's being propped up with government-approved fraud, but I’m sure they focus-grouped their messaging, and this is what they went with for a reason. It doesn’t matter. None of this matters.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 16th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing happened in the markets today, and Bitcoin fell again.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/crypto-carnage-continues-bonds-stocks-mixed-ahead-catalyst-heavy-week , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-stocks-were-subdued-amid-ongoing-tech-woes-while-markets-brace-nfps-newsquawk-asia-pac

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. Healthcare
o 3. Utilities
o 4. Consumer Discretionary
o 5. Real Estate
o 6. Consumer Staples
o 7. Gold
o
- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Bitcoin
o 2. Crypto
o 3. Natural Gas
o 4. WTI Crude Oil
o 5. Brent Crude Oil
o 6. Information Technology

- The rate cut is over, and the economy is dogshit, so there is no reason for the markets to go higher. Trump needs to announce more bailouts soon.

- The only thing happening in geopolitics is that oil supertankers that were heading for Venezuela have turned around because they don’t want the US military seizing them in more acts of piracy. No word yet on military escorts from Russia or otherwise.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/energy/supertankers-bound-venezuela-make-u-turns-fearing-us-interdiction-pdvsa-hit-cyberattack

- So the bottom line is that nothing is happening, but I don’t expect this to continue. I expect Trump to do something to keep the bubble propped up shortly because he can’t afford to let it pop.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 15th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The top story on Zerohedge is that “If AI fails to deliver on its vast productivity promise, the result will be a devastating depression”. Yes, and that’s exactly what’s going to happen. The government pinned all its hopes on the bullshit hype of a bunch of tech bros who promised them that an algorithm would replace the labor market and create infinite money to pay for their wars and welfare. Enjoy the show.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/if-ai-fails-deliver-its-vast-productivity-promises-result-will-be-devastating-depression

- A Texas data center company plunged 50% today due to its first tenant being lost. This is causing an overreaction, but it means AI datacenters may have peaked and will begin to decline, contrary to the official narrative that we’re going to build AI datacenters in orbit and power them with solar panels the size of the Death Star.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/fermi-craters-50-after-losing-first-tenant-its-massive-texas-data-center , https://blogs.nvidia.com/blog/starcloud/

- They’re also warning that in 2026, when Trump appoints the new chairman of the FED that the FED will lower interest rates to bail out the government, which will cause a stagflationary depression.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/fedtreasury-merger-underway-forget-market-ever-again-signaling-govt-it-spending-too-much , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/goldman-desk-forceful-rotation-below-surface-has-been-shock-many-portfolios , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/were-beginning-credit-destruction-cycle-ed-dowd-warns , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/bis-warns-rare-double-bubble , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/hartnett-markets-are-frontrunning-2026s-run-it-hot-economy

- Bitcoin fell today so much that it made headlines. It has to do with a Bitcoin Trust formally known as Microstrategy being removed from indexes, although it hasn’t happened yet.
source: https://coinpedia.org/news/why-bitcoin-price-is-going-down-today/ , https://www.forbes.com/sites/digital-assets/2025/12/14/saylor-issues-stark-warning-amid-sudden-scramble-to-update-bitcoin-price-predictions/

- Nothing is going on in geopolitics. There was a Muslim shooter who killed 16 people and injured 38 people in a Hanukkah celebration in Australia, and everyone is pouring out support for the Jewish community on the same day that Israel once again violated their ceasefire in Gaza and killed 4 people in Gaza today. However, the spooky thing is that Candice Owens has been warning of a false flag attack during the second week of December for months, and everyone was giving her shit and making fun of her for making her prediction, and then this happened. Although I don’t think 16 dead jews equate to a 9-11 false flag, the fact that anything happened precisely when Candice Owens said it would is spooky.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/high-level-hamas-planner-oct7-assassinated-idf-strike-gaza-city , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/evil-act-anti-semitism-terrorism-12-dead-after-shooting-australian-jewish-event , https://www.hindustantimes.com/world-news/us-news/candace-owens-9-11-style-attack-post-surfaces-after-brown-university-shooting-so-she-was-right-again-101765668512230.html , https://x.com/LetsGoBrando45/status/2000270702432145534

- So the bottom line is that the only thing that happened that we haven’t already talked about is the attack on the Jewish party in Australia that killed fewer than 20 people. If the goal of this was to turn Jews into victims and make everyone forget about Gaza, I guess it worked, but for how long? I don’t see this erasing everything Israel has done or resulting in anything significant. I also don’t think the US can fight any additional wars at the moment, as they’re losing the ones they’re already involved in, so the only benefit I see here is that people are (temporarily) not talking about Gaza at the moment, but who cares?

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 12th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- One day after the Fed cut rates, things were already starting to crack as Oracle crashed, erasing all the recent gains it had made from the AI circle jerk.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/stocks-mixed-oracle-concerns-pressure-ndx-spx-sees-record-close-newsquawk-us-market-wrap , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/gold-silver-jump-bitcoin-big-tech-dump-orcls-grinch-slams-santa-powell , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/oracle-plunges-most-dot-com-bubble-cds-blow-out-lehman-crisis-levels

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Materials
o 2. Financials
o 3. Industrials
o 4. Gold
o 5. Healthcare
o 6. Consumer Staples
o 7. Utilities

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. Natural Gas
o 2. The VIX
o 3. WTI Crude Oil
o 4. Brent Crude Oil
o 5. Bitcoin
o 6. Energy
o 7. Information Technology

- Strong “peak market” signals here as if the market is beginning to rotate from growth ro recession, but we can’t have a recession until at least Q2 2026 at the earliest, and I doubt Trump is going to stop manipulating the government numbers, so we’re going to have a “silent recession” aka a “K-shaped economy” aka “socialism for billionaires”.

- In geopolitics, Larry Fink of BlackRock is attending the Ukraine negotiations with Zelensky alongside Jared Kushner, Steve Witkoff, and Zelensky. Every single one of them is Jewish.
source: https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2025-12-10/blackrock-s-larry-fink-joins-trump-team-talks-to-rebuild-ukraine

- The US seized a Venezuelan oil tanker the other day in a blatant act of piracy, and signalled they are going to keep doing it. I predicted that Russia would begin providing escorts for Venezuelan tankers, and today, Putin expressed his support and reaffirmed Russia’s support for Venezuela. Russia isn’t going to back down; the US will, mark my words. They were offered a deal, but Trump apparently still thinks he can dislodge BRICS from South America by being a pirate, and he’ll find out soon enough. My hunch is that Russia will begin providing military escorts for Venezuelan tankers and launch some stuff in the UN that will go nowhere. My best guess is that Trump will still take the deal, but he wants to wave his dick around a little so it doesn’t look like he backed down from Russia, and that’s what this is about. He doesn’t really think Russia is going to cuck, does he? That ship sailed a long time ago.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/putin-doubles-down-backing-maduro-after-us-seizes-oil-tanker

- The bottom line is that nothing is really happening. I will be extremely surprised if Trump escalates in Venezuela, but it would be good if he did because it would bring about the collapse of the Regime sooner. So go ahead and underestimate Russia again. Those carrier-killing kamikaze drone torpedoes are probably just propaganda, right? Again, I predict that Trump waves his dick around and takes the deal, but if he wants to lose a fleet, that’s a choice too.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 11th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Apparently, the FED rate was today, not the 17th. It doesn’t change anything, as everything happened as expected. However, the stock market is surging back to all-time highs as everyone piles back into the AI bubble because the market didn’t crash, and there’s nowhere else to go, so even though everyone knows it’s fake and gay, the AI bubble is the only place to make money.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/stocks-bonds-bullion-bitcoin-bid-fed-cuts-rates-launches-not-qe , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-stocks-gained-and-dollar-fell-aftermath-dovish-fomc-newsquawk-asia-pac-market-open , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/fomc-33

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Industrials
o 2. Materials
o 3. Consumer Discretionary
o 4. Financials
o 5. Healthcare
o 6. Natural Gas
o 7. Brent Crude Oil

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. Bitcoin
o 3. The US Dollar
o 4. Utilities
o Everything else was up.

- Sadly, with the rate cut behind us, that’s all, folks. There ain’t shit else happening for the rest of the year.

- In geopolitics, ain’t shit happening either. Ukraine is attacking Russian oil tankers and asking Russia for a ceasefire to make them stop, and Russia said no and continued to kick the ever living shit out of Ukraine. Trump is trying to push for some kind of peace deal by Christmas, and there is some talk of holding elections and replacing Zelensky with someone else, but the issue is Europe. We already talked about the issues with Europe on the show, though.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/watch-third-russian-oil-tanker-hit-sea-drone-black-sea , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/russia-rejects-new-zelensky-offer-energy-ceasefire-grid-repair-woes-worsen , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/zelensky-definitively-shuts-door-trump-peace-plan-wont-cede-territory , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/russia-makes-more-gains-east-trump-concedes-some-point-size-will-win

- So the bottom line is that the rest of the month is going to be boring, and I wouldn’t count on the rate cut bump to last because the economy is dogshit. Trump needs to announce more bailouts or something if he wants to keep the markets propped up. The markets may crash again later this week as the news of the rate cuts fades. The goldfish memory of the normies cuts both ways.

Monkey’s Market Minute: December 8th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The only news in the market is that the FED is set to announce that it’s going to be buying more government bonds again on Wednesday. The FOMC meeting isn’t until the 17th-18th, but they’re expected to cut rates, not that it matters to the AI bubble because “everyone who has gone all in on AI knows that losing isn’t an option”.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/former-ny-fed-repo-guru-powell-will-announce-45-billion-bill-purchases-wednesday , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/everyone-who-has-already-gone-all-ai-knows-losing-isnt-option

- Bitcoin is up today, so I guess the normies are bullish. I saw some rumbling on social media that Bitcoin dumped and then pumped within 4 hours to wipe out the leveraged longs and shorts. Don’t use leverage, like EVER. The only kind of options you should be doing is SELLING covered calls because you can’t lose money, but options are for professional traders who do this shit for a living, not for retail investors.
source: https://www.tradingview.com/news/beincrypto:f02b9aa88094b:0-bitcoin-whipsaws-as-1-39-billion-whale-dump-triggers-coordinated-sell-off/

- In geopolitics, the Regime is taking the L against China, declaring that China is no longer their primary threat and that they’re going to focus on the Western Hemisphere (i.e., South America). This is what Trump should have done as soon as he came into office, and what all that stuff about the Panama Canal and Greenland was about. However, Israel forced Trump to keep the Ukraine War going as leverage with Iran and Russia, and everything went to shit. Now the US is on the other side of several lost conflicts, and Russia has declared that it stands “shoulder to shoulder” with Venezuela, and this is still all a war on BRICS, but the Regime is probably realizing that can’t beat China and Russia at the same time, so they’re hoping to cozy up to China to beat Russia first (and kick BRICS out of South America).
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/new-national-security-strategy-surprise-departure-americas-china-policy , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/russia-stands-shoulder-shoulder-venezuela-blasts-us-escalation-toward-conflict

- Meanwhile, Russia pounded Ukraine with a 600-strong drone swarm in an overnight strike. Ukraine is in “peace talks,” but they’re meaningless because the EU doesn’t want the war to end and for Europe to become globally irrelevant, and Trump can’t tell Europe to fuck themselves because he needs them to buy America’s bonds because nobody else will.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/zelenskyy-says-he-had-long-and-substantive-phone-call-witkoff-kushner-peace-talks , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/russian-forces-advance-ukraine-hit-more-600-drone-strikes-overnight

- The bottom line is that seeing the Regime pivot to South America in their war against BRICS while cozying up to China is tactically smart but strategically stupid. The Regime is hoping to double-cross China, but China is going to triple-cross them. China’s not stupid, but I’ve seen rumors of a deal in Venezuela where American companies get Venezuela’s oil, and the aggression against BRICS in South America stops. This would be a win for BRICS because they’re just running out the clock at this point, but it shows that BRICS knows how to manipulate Trump by giving him a “deal” that makes him think that he won.

- Lastly, I fed today’s Celestina picture into Grok Imagine, and it animated it. I’m so impressed, I stared at this for an embarrassingly long time.

The Morning Constitutional: June 25th, 2025

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Monkey’s Market Minute: June 24th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The propaganda was thick today, so allow me to break the gaslighting and tell you what’s happening:

- Firstly, I was right… sort of. I was right about the kayfabe, but I was wrong about the details of the kayfabe. I thought there would be a “grand bargain” where Trump gets Iran to give up its nukes (that don’t exist) in exchange for a peace deal with Israel. I didn’t count on a fake and gay attack on Iran’s nuclear facilities that did nothing, followed by a fake and gay attack on an American military base in Qatar, and then the announcement of a ceasefire. In the end it’s the same thing, and it would have been better if they did what I thought they were going to do because it’s obvious to anyone with eyes that Iran’s nuclear facilities were not destroyed and Trump is lying, so a “grand bargain” deal would have been far better than this fake gay shit.

- The Regime is flailing because they actually thought that the B2s and bunker busters would actually destroy Iran’s nuclear facilities. Trump bet big on that strike being successful and lost very similarly to how Israel bet big on their decapitation strike against Iran and lost. When will they stop underestimating BRICS nations? Anyway, what happened to all that “Regime Change” rhetoric from yesterday? It’s all been memory holed hasn’t it? It’s because of Medvedev’s tweet that Iran could be given nuclear warheads by other nations. That ended the Regime’s plans instantly and brought about the current “ceasefire” in less than 24 hours. Ironically, this simply proves that nuclear weapons are required and are the only defense against the Regime. Sad but true.

- Iran is denying that they agreed to a ceasefire with Israel, but there were reports that Iran has considered the strike on the American base in Qatar enough to consider their beef with America settled since the strike on their nuclear facilities didn’t do anything anyway. Perhaps Trump thought that Iran was including Israel as well, or maybe Trump is just talking shit. Why even knows any longer? At least the Strait of Hormuz isn’t being closed any longer, so maybe the government doesn’t have to manipulate the price.

- So the current geopolitical picture is a bit mercurial at the moment because Trump and Israel are having to rapidly change their plans for Regime Change in Iran due to Russia not only NOT throwing Iran under the bus, but openly talking of giving them nuclear warheads. A ceasefire (which Israel will inevitably violate) is the best possible scenario for the Regime at this point, but I don’t believe Iran is done bombing Israel yet. In fact, they have less than weeks’ worth of air defense missiles left, so they should keep up the pressure just like Russia is doing in Ukraine.

- However, as previously said, it’s clear that Iran doesn’t want to go to war with the US, so other than the attack on the one Qatar US base (which they told the US ahead of time they would strike while giving them time to evacuate) I doubt Iran will do anything else, including closing the Strait of Hormuz. This isn’t about Iran being weak, but was done in coordination with their BRICS allies. Remember that BRICS doesn’t want WW3, and simply wants to stop the Regime’s war machine, which is why the current tactic is to exhaust their air defense supplies. They don’t want a slaughter that will cause a nuclear exchange, just to exhaust the Regime economically and militarily so they’ll collapse like the USSR.

- Since the Regime Change rhetoric has been memory holed and now everyone is hailing Trump’s brilliance for this non-existent ceasefire, there may not be a false flag. The purpose of the false flag was to gin up support for the war, but if Russia is going to give Iran nukes and the war is cancelled, there’s no point in launching a terrorist attack in the first place. It’s kind of hilarious to see Trump try to maintain this image as a brilliant deal maker and world leader in the face of his string of embarrassing defeats, but Trump has charisma, so at least there’s that.

- Shifting to the markets, the energy markets crashed on the news that a ceasefire was reached (which Iran denies, but shhhhh), with crude oil falling 7% and natural gas falling over 4%. Earlier today, Trump tweeted about keeping oil prices low, so the ceasefire announcement may have been related directly to this issue.
source: https://oilprice.com/Latest-Energy-News/World-News/Trump-Orders-Oil-Sector-to-Keep-Prices-Low-After-Strikes-on-Iran.html , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/sentiment-lifted-and-crude-craters-iran-delivers-symbolic-strike-empty-us-bases-newsquawk

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Consumer Discretionary
o 2. Real-Estate
o 3. Consumer Staples
o 4. Materials
o 5. Industrials
o 6. Utilities
o 7. Financials

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. WTI Crude Oil
o 2. Brent Crude Oil
o 3. Natural Gas
o 4. The VIX
o 5. Energy
o 6. Broad Commodities
o 7. Crypto

- The market moves based on what the TV says, not what’s true, so currently the market is moving based on the assumption that Trump destroyed Iran’s nuclear facilities and they’re begging for a ceasefire with Israel because Trump played 4D chess or something. If the narrative changes tomorrow or if the realities of the battlefield contradict the propaganda, I expect the normies to panic again, but for now, they’re blissfully optimistic that Trump saved the day and Iran has surrendered.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/white-house-press-secretary-hints-iran-regime-change-claims-intel-said-weeks-nuclear

- The bottom line is that the Regime is losing strategically and its airstrikes are ineffective, but thankfully for the world, BRICS doesn’t want WW3 and is willing to de-escalate since time is on their side, and the more defeats the Regime is handed, the quicker de-dollarization momentum builds and the Regime falls once and for all. Nuclear war is the only way BRICS loses (not that the Regime wins, it’s a tie when you think about it). The challenge for the Regime is to spin their strategic defeats as victories using propaganda and gaslighting, but that’s better than using false flags and terrorism to try to overthrow the Iranian government, so it’s a win. BRICS doesn’t need to win the propaganda war (especially in the West) as long as it wins the actual war on the battlefield

- So while some may say that “nothing ever happens” because WW3 didn’t break out and we didn’t nuke each other, that’s not true. BRICS won by forcing the Regime to abandon its plans for war with Iran in less than 24 hours and pivot to this ceasefire narrative. The Regime takes another L, and since we won’t be at war, maybe we won’t “money printer go brrrrr” in a couple of months when we enter recession officially and the market crashes. We’ll see.

The Morning Constitutional: June 18th, 2025

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Monkey’s Market Minute: June 16th, 2025

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Lots of updates, we’ve officially left the “nothing ever happens” era:

- Since Iran’s air defenses have been restored, Israeli air strikes have ended and Israel will not enter Iranian air space and is forced to launch missiles form Iraqi airspace and rely on terrorist tactics from within Iran using sleeper agents (mostly drones, sabotage and car bombs). Needless to say, this isn’t enough to bring down the Iranian government, and Iran is already ferreting out the terrorist cells, and estimate they’ve eliminated 80% of the terrorist cells already. Israel has no other cards to play other than “the Samson Option” to threaten Iran.
source: https://x.com/Megatron_ron/status/1934390630593028382 , https://x.com/Megatron_ron/status/1934365587263623563 , https://x.com/Megatron_ron/status/1934356544155537533 , https://x.com/Megatron_ron/status/1934269154657505412 , https://x.com/Megatron_ron/status/1934249591207059765

- Iran is launching another wave of missiles right now and they’re getting through despite multiple countries helping Israel with their air defenses. Iran says they have enough missiles to bomb Israel every day for 6 months. Israel is begging for help at this point, but the only country that’s answered the call is France, big oof.
source: https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/france-president-emmanual-macron-says-iran-destabilised-region-france-will-defend-israel-8663029 , https://www.newindianexpress.com/world/2025/Jun/14/iran-warns-us-uk-france-against-helping-stop-retaliatory-strikes-on-israel

- The UN conference on Palestinian statehood was cancelled due to Israel attacking Iran. Was this why Israel launched the attack when they did, to derail the conversation about the two-state solution? Boy did they leap out of the frying pan and into the fire with that move.
source: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/14/world/middleeast/palestinian-statehood-conference-postponed-israel-iran.html

- Finally, as we await the inevitable terrorist attack by Israel to get the US into the war, Netanyahu is talking about an assassination plot by Iran to kill Trump. Would Israel really assassinate Trump? Actually, it makes more sense than you might think. Now that Trump used peace talks as a rouse to lure Iran into a false sense of security, nobody will ever trust Trump’s “diplomacy” again, but if Trump is removed and replaced with JD Vance, then maybe BRICS will give the US a second chance and allow the regime to play the same trick again. Trump has been a massive failure on all fronts anyway, so he’s outlived his usefulness. Israel assassinating him would allow Trump to serve one final purpose.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trump-hints-possible-us-entry-war-amid-stepped-israeli-daytime-attacks-tehran , https://x.com/ExxAlerts/status/1934331564013629621

- Iran isn’t stupid and knows that the Regime will organize against them, but you’re not hearing much just like you’re not hearing much from Russia or China. Behind the scenes everyone knows that if countries start making public declarations that this can spiral out into WW3, which the Regime cannot win by their own admission. Again, I didn’t think that Israel would attack Iran because this exact thing would happen, and now Israel is “finding out”.
source: https://x.com/Kahlissee/status/1934351886779568476

- The Regime was defeated in Ukraine but it will die in Israel, figuratively and literally. The best part is that this will be a self-inflicted wound. Israel chose to attack Iran believing Iran to be weak just like NATO thought Russia was weak, and Trump thought China was economically weak when he launched his trade war. Their hubris and stupidity has led them to their own demise.

- The markets are going to crash tomorrow unless Trump and the Regime throw Israel under the bus and make peace with BRICS, which we all know they will NEVER do. Iran hasn’t committed to closing the Strait of Hormuz yet, but is reserving that as a threat to give the Regime second-thoughts about escalation. If Iran closes the Strait, you’ll see $100 oil and $7 gasoline within a week and the markets will crash. According to Polymarket, there is currently a 34% chance Iran will close the Strait of Hormuz, but the number was 40% yesterday when Israel was “winning”. Now that Iran has the advantage, the odds of a global energy crisis are falling, but that’s the rub. The Regime can’t win because if Iran is threatened, they’ll cause a global financial crisis, but they’re already in too deep, and because we’re talking about Israel, the Regime will have their back 200%.
source: https://www.cnbc.com/2025/06/13/israel-iran-conflict-why-tehran-wont-block-the-hormuz-strait.html , https://www.yahoo.com/news/could-iran-carry-threat-shut-230354895.html , https://polymarket.com/event/will-iran-close-the-strait-of-hormuz-in-2025 , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/oil-and-gold-jump-israel-targets-iranian-energy-infrastructure

- So the Regime can downplay Israel losing the war they started with Iran in order to keep the markets calm, or they can beat the drums of war and watch energy prices skyrocket and the markets crash. Either way, they lose. They’re checkmated and cannot win. This is why I thought Trump would cut a deal and reset everything with Israel, because it was the smart move. Now they’re in too deep and they’re fucked no matter what they do.

- The bottom line is that the next shoe to drop is the terrorist attack and possible assassination of Trump by ((Iran)) in order to get the US to go to war for Israel, which won’t work at this point, and Russia and China DO have Iran’s back. Israel jew’d too close to the sun this time. How far will they go? Are we looking at the fall of Weimar or the fall of Judea? Only time will tell.

The Morning Constitutional: June 11th, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: June 4th, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: May 28th, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: May 21st, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: May 14th, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: May 7th, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: April 30th, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: April 23rd, 2025

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The Morning Constitutional: April 16th, 2025

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