Monkey’s Market Minute: May 15th, 2026

- Nothing happened today.
source: https://time.com/article/2026/05/14/trump-xi-china-iran-strait-hormuz/ , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/trumps-beijing-trip-triggers-bid-big-tech-bitcoin-bond-oil-gold-dip , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/killshot-coming-earth-warned-cia-remote-viewer-recent-death , https://www.zerohedge.com/the-market-ear/melt-keeps-sucking-people , https://oilprice.com/Energy/Energy-General/Indias-Oil-Crisis-Deepens-as-Hormuz-Remains-Shut.html , https://oilprice.com/Energy/Energy-General/Berkshire-Hathaways-Power-Bet-is-Starting-to-Look-Riskier.html

- Will something happen tomorrow? Probably not.

- On an unrelated note, I’ve been working on the updated characters for the new season of the TFM show, which will have a cyberpunk/Blade Runner theme, and I’ll give you a sneak preview.

Monkey’s Market Minute: May 14th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Investors are apparently “panic buying” tech stocks even as inflation is exploding, the bond market is crashing, and we’ve lost the war. Why are investors “panic buying” tech stocks at a time like this? Because it’s not real. It’s all fraud and bullshit. The rest of the market is crashing, but the massively overpriced tech stocks are surging DURING inflation, DURING fucking inflation? Get the fuck out of here.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/jensen-sparks-big-tech-dip-buying-despite-volcanic-ppi-erupting-oil-bitcoin-battering , https://www.post-gazette.com/business/money/2026/05/13/stock-market-today-may-13-2026/stories/202605130027

- Israel is getting fucked up in Lebanon thanks to Hezbollah’s use of FPV drones, giving the Regime the Ukraine treatment. Ukraine is sending experienced trainers to Israel to train the IDF on how to deal with FPV drones. It’s not going well. Hezbollah also knows the government of Lebanon is compromised, and they are making plans to overthrow the puppet politicians themselves. Based. Meanwhile, the puppet government is condemning Iran for supporting Hezbollah and resisting Israel’s aggression. How dare they!
source: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/may/12/how-hezbollah-3d-printed-drones-challenging-israeli-military , https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/videos/international/hezbollah-drone-hunts-idf-soldier-dodges-israeli-defences-amid-lebanon-fighting/videoshow/131079635.cms , https://www.jpost.com/middle-east/article-895968 , https://shafaq.com/en/Middle-East/Lebanon-accuses-Iran-at-UN-of-fueling-war-with-Israel

- Trump’s trip to China is a big nothingburger. The media is largely ignoring it, which tells you everything you need to know.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trump-says-open-china-landing-beijing-pomp-filled-red-carpet-airport-welcome

- Trump is scheduled to leave China on Friday, so nothing is going to happen for the rest of the week. Just enjoy the peace before the fireworks start again.

- The bottom line is that everything is on cruise control due to Trump’s trip to China. The wars are lost, but on hold. The economy is dogshit, but the markets are being propped up. Everything is artificially being frozen so Trump can pretend he isn’t a complete loser while he accomplishes nothing during these talks with Xi. I’m pretty sure all the Jewish CEOs he brought with them are making Xi an offer to sell the US out to save Israel from the bed they made themselves.

- On an unrelated note, I created a new YouTube channel completely unrelated to my MGTOW content, based around the game Identity V, which I enjoy. My avatar is a biblically accurate angel because I don’t have to animate the face at all. I use a voice changer as an attempt to disguise my voice, so if that bothers you, it is what it is.
Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/@tfmidv25

The Morning Constitutional: May 13th, 2026
https://www.mgtow.tv/watch/the-morning-constitutional-may-13th-2026_g7lPTgVZaRrM2AI.html
/watch/the-morning-constitutional-may-13th-2026_g7lPTgVZaRrM2AI.html

NOTE: I couldn't upload the MMM yesterday because the site was taken down and replaced with a phishing site. I will post yesterday's news letter as a comment to this one.

Monkey’s Market Minute: May 12th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- I’m afraid nothing is happening this week since Trump and Xi are scheduled to meet this week. Iran isn’t going to escalate, so don’t expect anything to happen.
source: https://www.reuters.com/world/china/rare-earths-deal-between-us-china-is-still-effect-us-official-says-2026-05-10/

- With Trump and Iran both publicly rejecting each other’s peace proposals, and the hopes for a peace deal plunging, it should surprise nobody that the stock market just hit a new all-time high today.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/oil-stocks-gold-bitcoin-iran-peace-deal-hopes-plunge , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/options-market-has-flipped-top-goldman-trader-warns-gammaskew-extremes-mean-increasing

- India is rationing fuel as the oil shock spreads throughout Asia, and gasoline prices in California are over $6, so it should surprise nobody that oil prices remain under $100 at $99.30 for WTI.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/commodities/modi-urges-indians-conserve-fuel-oil-shock-spreads , https://www.wsj.com/business/energy-oil/think-6-gas-is-bad-its-about-to-get-even-worse-in-california-354d3d2f , https://oilprice.com/Energy/Crude-Oil/Oil-Market-Runs-Down-Safety-Cushion-as-Supply-Shock-Worsens.html

- The only thing worth mentioning today is that it’s apparently been leaked that the Regime will use the V-22 to airdrop soldiers into Iran. The V-22 is a hybrid helicopter. I’ll include a picture of one with the newsletter since it would be easier to show you rather than tell you. It’s not a new aircraft; it was developed in the late 80s and has been used by special forces since then. The problem with the ground invasion of Iran isn’t getting the troops into Iran; it’s overcoming the fact that you’re severely outnumbered by a well-defended enemy and cut off from any retreat or resupply.
source: https://merovingian.club/web/@Terry@poa.st/116558386627374852

- Oh, and it’s not just me calling it. The Atlantic has declared that Trump is “checkmated” in Iran and cannot win even if he tried.
source: https://www.theatlantic.com/international/2026/05/iran-war-trump-losing/687094/

- The bottom line is that I don’t expect anything significant to happen until the meeting between Trump and Xi is over. The market is so fake and gay that I can’t even look at it anymore. Not even for entertainment.

Monkey’s Market Minute: May 8th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The US Navy attacked an Iranian oil tanker, so the Iranians attacked the ships. According to the Iranians, they damaged the ships severely, but according to the Regime, they missed entirely, but the ships fled anyway for funsies. The Regime then shot missiles at Bandar Abbas and Qeshm Island. Iran has implicated that the UAE was also involved in the attack, and will be responding.
source: https://x.com/sahouraxo/status/2052492610174935289 , https://x.com/ripplebrain/status/2052533036177146120 , https://x.com/HormuzLetter/status/2052475486601699804 , https://x.com/Megatron_ron/status/2052511742157349128 , https://x.com/RT_com/status/2052523815352041715 , https://x.com/MyLordBebo/status/2052556533649625334

- Regarding the Hanta Virus. Everyone is worried that they’re gearing up for more COVID lockdowns, but I think this is just one of those things that happened, and the system will work as intended, and it’ll be dealt with quickly. Why do I say that? Two reasons:

1. The media isn’t hyping up the fear like they were with COVID. They appear to be keeping people calm.

2. There is no safe vaccine for the elites to use to protect themselves. There have been hantavirus vaccines in the works, but they all cause severe side effects. The Elites won’t release a pandemic unless they know it’s a hoax (i.e., reclassifying seasonal flu as COVID) or if they have a “cure” for themselves so that only the desired target population dies. They’re not going to release a virus with no cure or vaccine that will kill them.

- Remember when there was an Obola scare, and it was handled quickly, quietly, and was forgotten bout in a month? That’s what I predict will happen here. The government does have systems for dealing with actual deadly diseases, and those systems save lives. It’s just that those systems can be used for corrupt power grabs as well. Maybe I’m wrong, and the Jews did it, but I think this will blow over in a couple of weeks after all the infected cases are quarantined.

- So now that the war is officially back on, you won’t be surprised to learn that oil prices fell under $100 again based on an unprecedented amount of options contracts flooding the market all at once. I know you’re shocked, right? Who could have foreseen this?
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/record-shattering-call-options-activity-sparks-goldman-partner-warning-markets-semi , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/irans-yellow-cake-red-line-ruins-black-gold-driven-green-day-hopes-stocks

- So the bottom line is that, from reports, the Regime was not expecting Iran to retaliate so aggressively, and if the war goes back to missile tag, America will begin depleting its ammo stock before it’s even ready for the ground invasion. Womp womp.
source: https://x.com/RyanRozbiani/status/2052489121050825068

Monkey’s Market Minute: May 7th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing really to report since the show earlier today. Trump pumped and dumped futures, and insiders made money through insider trading, as you do. The TLDR is that Trump announced that a deal was in the works and the war was over, then Iran called Trump out for his bullshit, but in the intervening time, insiders were able to make money by front-running the announcement and selling before Iran could debunk their lies. This is the President of the United States and his inner circle treating the markets like a crypto scam.

- The Regime’s cope for cancelling “Operation Freedom” after a single day without admitting that Iran called their bluff and fired drones at them, is that Saudi Arabia and other Arab “allies” told them they weren’t going to let the US use their bases, and that’s why they cancelled Operation Freedom.

- There’s not much else to mention. The FBI is going to release more alien files to distract you because they think you’re that stupid.

- We’re draining the SPR currently, and oil is still above $100 with nowhere to go but up.

- The bottom line is that nothing happened. The 30-day countdown has begun. Iran has vowed to attack the US if they don’t withdraw their blocade and admit defeat. They’re not going to let them float out in the Arabian Sea and pretend not to lose like with Ukraine. Tick Tock.

The Morning Constitutional: May 6th, 2026
https://www.mgtow.tv/watch/2026-05-06-08-00-10_1SrNXgvx77bJI3t.html
/watch/2026-05-06-08-00-10_1SrNXgvx77bJI3t.html

Monkey’s Market Minute: May 5th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- I was wrong. I thought through the data and behavior and came up with a reasonable scenario that fit all the available data and would accomplish the goals of the various parties, and I couldn’t think of an alternative, which is why I was so confident. However, I always put a caveat that I can’t predict genuine stupidity. If someone does something retarded, I can’t predict that. It’s not that I can’t see the possibility of someone doing something stupid, but I have to believe that someone is going to speak up and say “that’s fucking retarded” and put a stop to it. I shouldn’t be smarter than the most powerful people on Earth.

- So “Operation Freedom” was not a kayfabe wherein Trump gets Iran to let some ships go so that Trump can declare victory, drop the blockade, and sail away while saving face. The retard just sent a missile destroyer into the Strait of Hormuz, which ignored repeated Iranian warnings, and was hit by several drones, blowing the shit out of the rear hull, which caused the ship to turn around and run away. He honestly expected Iran to cuck for no reason after winning. What a dumbass.

- Now the US appears to be preparing for the prophesied big attack on Iran, but wait … a Trump insider just opened a $6M short on oil, which means if the pattern of following the insider trading holds up, then oil is about to crash, which means the US will cuck because Iran didn’t JUST attack the destroyer, but they also destroyed the UAE’s terminal which bypassed the Strait of Hormuz, and basically said that no oil moves without Iran’s say so, and the UAE is their bitch now.
source: https://x.com/DeFi_Hanzo/status/2051257761254564018 , https://merovingian.club/web/@Terry@poa.st/116519144246137137 , https://merovingian.club/web/@Terry@poa.st/116518797501170766 , https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2026/05/developing-ceasefire-apparently-as-iran-fires-missiles-uae/

- Hedge funds are dumping tech and oil is back over $100 again.
source: https://x.com/GlobalMktObserv/status/2051306102860472443 , https://x.com/jimstewartson/status/2051331982093947092

- I know that there is supposedly a Trump insider shorting oil, and what Trump did and is doing makes no logical sense, so maybe this is just a ploy to make more money using insider trading, because if Trump actually is doing what he appears to be doing, he’s the dumbest piece of shit ever. I’m still in disbelief that “Operation Freedom” was just Trump expecting the Iranians to cuck for no reason and let him win to avoid a second phase of the war that they won.

- Sadly, what this means is that my analysis is useless. I can’t predict stupidity. Either this is a ploy to make money using insider trading, or Trump just wrote the biggest check with his mouth that his ass cannot cash whatsoever.

- The bond market might also be blowing up, or it might be a glitch, hard to say. China has an incentive to dump its remaining bonds because they are defying US sanctions on Iran, but there is no confirmation, and it could be a glitch … we’ll see. If China is aggressively dumping bonds, that’s a troubling sign that Trump REEEEEAAAAALLLY fucked up.
source: https://x.com/DarioCpx/status/2051191081392582857

- The bottom line is that either this is an insider-trading scheme or shit’s about to get really spicy. I’m honestly happy that Iran attacked the ship and that I was wrong about the kayfabe. That was just the only scenario I could think of that fit the data, but Trump is just a dumbass. He’s a typical boomer who is too old and stubborn to do anything but double down. Good! I can’t wait for more footage of Tel Aviv being destroyed. I’m sure China is very pleased to see the US using up its Asian arsenal against Iran as well. Between Biden and Trump’s boomer retardation, the Regime is destroying itself at a pace I couldn’t have guessed.

Monkey’s Market Minute: May 4th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

Trump has announced "Project Freedom" to liberate the ships trapped in the Strait of Hormuz, which are only there because the United States and Israel violated a ceasefire and blockaded Iran (ineffectually) in the first place, using several disposable missile destroyers staffed with approximately 15,000 personnel. This is happening because "Operation Epic Fury" is officially over, as it's been 60 days. Trump has to go to Congress if he wants to continue the war, so he's created this "humanitarian crisis" to justify further aggression without Congress having to actually declare war, and that's all.

When Iran destroys the ships, Trump will clutch his pearls and pretend that the Iranians attacked for no reason at all, and the media will parrot everything while the MAGAtards claim Trump is a genius because he made Iran attack again, which was all part of his 6D chess move.

None of this matters. It's just a shame that Trump is sacrificing the lives of these Navy personnel for nothing, but at least they'll die for Israel, right?

There is a chance that Iran just lets the ships go, despite them only being held due to the actions of the Regime, simply to take away Trump's justification for a continued war, which Trump will hail as a great victory, and the MAGAtards will cheer about what a genius he is, and how it was all part of his 7D chess move. Maybe that's the plan to give America an "out" and save face after losing, so they'll fuck off.

The markets are going to follow developments in the Strait of Hormuz, seasoned with pro-Regime spin and propaganda. If Iran lets the ships go and gives Trump a "win", stocks will soar as the perception will be that the war is over. If Iran sinks the battleships, giving Trump a cause to attack Iran again, stocks might crash unless the government props them up irrationally. It's hard to say, but my hunch is that Trump doesn't want a war, but he needs a "win", so Iran lets the ships go, America leaves the region, and the blockade is quietly abandoned, giving Iran everything it demanded, but will be seen as a victory by those who want to be lied to.

Then things will shift to Cuba and World War 3. Why not keep the focus on Iran if the goal is to stoke World War 3 fears? Because of Israel. The Regime wants to protect Israel at all costs, so moving the focus from Iran to Cuba means Iran can be quietly memory-holed and Russia and China can take center-stage.

Finally, China has directed its oil refinery companies to ignore all threats from the US regarding sanctions. This is a big move and means China is fully prepared to completely de-dollarize now, or else they wouldn't be doing this. The Chinese are patient and never make a move unless they know with absolute certainty that it's going to end in their favor, no matter what.

The bottom line is that we will see what Iran does and how "Project Freedom" goes. If I were Iran, I'd sink the ships, but I know the goal is to help America save face as they admit defeat. It's all fake and gay. Everything is just pro wrestling with boomers who can't even throw a punch any longer, the worst kind of pro wrestling.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 30th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- News has gotten out that Iran can move oil by train, and that the blockade is a joke. Trump is now threatening to attack Iran again. However, I believe the action by the UAE is strong evidence that they will not. If they attack Iran, Iran will destroy the UAE, and they won’t be able to increase oil supplies and will have left OPEC for nothing. The Regime is saying one thing but doing another, and I always follow what someone does rather than what they say.

- The markets are shitting the bed today because not only is the war back on (for now), and commodities are spiking, but the FED kept interest rates at the current level and didn’t cut them. Looks like that Trump insider who went long on oil over the weekend was right. You gotta love the rigged casino.

There isn’t much to talk about. The tech companies lost money because of higher costs and lower revenue, but again, I believe Trump won’t attack Iran because Iran will destroy the UAE and oil will go much higher, negating the benefit of the UAE leaving OPEC in order to increase production. I predict Trump will calm the markets down by the end of the week only to reignite fears over the weekend and then calm them on Monday when the markets reopen. Get used to this happening every week until the midterms are over and Trump is impeached.

- Sorry this newsletter is so short. The markets are fake and gay, and it’s up to Israel whether or not the war enters a new phase, so we’re just waiting for them to do something stupid.

The Morning Constitutional: April 29th, 2026
https://www.mgtow.tv/watch/2026-04-29-08-00-30_WutaL7KazASt4Fv.html
/2026-04-29-08-00-30_WutaL7KazASt4Fv.html

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 28th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing is really happening in Iran. Iran has offered to make a deal with America regarding the Strait of Hormuz only and putting the nuclear issue aside, which is probably a good deal for Trump, and he’s currently “thinking about it.” Iran also met with Putin, which could mean that Iran will bring in Russia as a guarantor of peace with America and Israel.
source: https://x.com/MyLordBebo/status/2048928186554110422 , https://x.com/RT_com/status/2048893570979872894 , https://x.com/StealthQE4/status/2048932784245195086

- Speaking of Israel, they broke the ceasefire (nooooo, really?) and bombed deep into Lebanon, and the government of Lebanon blamed Hezbollah for “dragging the nation into war” instead of Israel for bombing innocent people. I get it, the government of Lebanon is weak and cannot defend itself from Israel. The irony is that Israel did it to them. They wanted a weak neighbor that they could bully, so the government of Lebanon has a shit military by design, which is why they can’t do anything about Hezbollah. If the government could deal with Hezbollah, it would have the strength to resist Israel, which Israel doesn’t want. They just keep making their own problems and blaming everyone but themselves.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/israel-bombs-deep-lebanon-first-time-3-week-ceasefire

- None of this means anything unless Trump takes Iran’s deal, which Israel won’t let him do. Either something happens now, or something happens later when the situation becomes more desperate, and the government’s manipulation begins to break down, and the economic situation falls apart.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-offers-new-proposal-reopen-strait-trump-open-sealing-deal-phone , https://www.zerohedge.com/energy/goldman-goes-code-red-global-petrochemical-shock

- In the markets, OpenAI missed its revenue and user targets as they’re worried that they won’t be able to come up with the $1.5T they promised to fund the AI circle jerk. *yawn* Nothing to see here. AI bubble to the moon. New all-time highs based on nothing coming soon!
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/openai-misses-revenue-user-targets-cfo-fears-15-trillion-commitments-cant-be-paid

- This Wednesday is the big tech companies' (Mag7) quarterly earnings reports, but even if they miss their targets like OpenAI, nothing will happen. The government is nowhere near the point where it will actually allow the markets to crash. There might be a small pullback of 10% of so, which will recover quickly once the world doesn’t end after a day or two and the normies pour back into the same tech stocks that are losing money.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/ahead-wednesdays-mag-7-earnings-juggernaut-why-600-billion-capex-may-not-be-enough , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/calm-storm-markets-go-nowhere-ahead-event-risk-heavy-week , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/semis-have-completely-dislocated-ism-readings-gap-always-closes-one-way-or-another

- So the bottom line is that nothing is happening because Trump hasn’t decided to take Iran’s deal. After all, Israel doesn’t want him to, but he has no other choice but to move forward with the doomed ground offensive or launch a false flag to justify a larger ground offensive and a draft. Just enjoy the quiet and do something enjoyable this week. If the war reignites or if Trump takes the deal, it doesn’t really matter. The economy is fucked either way.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 27th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- There isn’t much to say. As the week begins, Trump is threatening Iran again and surely will announce that Iran is begging for a deal, which will be scheduled for Friday after the markets close. Iran will say Trump is lying, the markets will hit new all-time highs, and on Friday, Trump will cancel the meeting because there was never a meeting to begin with. Lather – Rinse – Repeat until the energy crisis strikes in full force later this year.
source: https://x.com/MarioNawfal/status/2048543395451191486

- However, there is a rumor that a Trump insider has put a $28M long on oil, which means he’s betting oil is about to spike, which could mean an escalation will happen this week. We’ll see. Iran is fully prepared. Let’s start this party already. It’s telling that the best indicator for what is really happening is based on watching gambling markets for corrupt insider trading.
source: https://x.com/VladTheInflator/status/2048581227708588245

- In the markets and economy, Goldman Sachs is warning investors about a market pullback, and Scott Bessent is defending the swap lines with the UAE and confirming that the swap lines are extended to both the Middle East and Asia, which means that it’s everyone who uses the dollar and not just Europe.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/goldman-desk-braces-market-pullback-five-warning-signs-are-flashing , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/bessent-defends-us-dollar-swap-lines-uae-considers-formal-funding-request

- So the bottom line is that I don’t see anything that makes this week special or more likely than last week for the Regime to launch their attack against Iran, but the insider trading indicates that this might be the week they do something, and the fireworks begin. We’ll just have to see. Iran isn’t going to strike first since they’re in the winning position.

- Breaking News: As I was writing this newsletter, Axios, which lies all the time and spreads obvious propaganda, reported that Iran is going to open the Strait of Hormuz for literally no reason, and this is being reported everywhere as if it’s serious and real. I can’t anymore with this shit. I just can’t.
source: https://x.com/Polymarket/status/2048584959481254399 , https://x.com/MarioNawfal/status/2048575859246924278 , https://x.com/RT_com/status/2048580098966852059

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 24th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Today Iran’s air defenses shot down several Israeli drones over Iranian airspace originating from Kurdistan in Iraq. Iran launched missile strikes against the Kurds in response. Is this an isolated incident, or the opening moves in the new phase of the war ahead of the main offensive this weekend?
source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkum993Yx_U

- Israel has agreed to a 3-week extended ceasefire in Lebanon as they are presumably going to focus on Iran.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/us-intercepts-iranian-tankers-tehran-keeps-hormuz-chokepoint-shut , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/israel-waiting-us-greenlight-renew-iran-war-new-targets-marked-says-katz

- The markets dipped today with the war imminent and all, but I fully expect some retarded bullshit tomorrow. Trump will announce that he won the war again and the markets will go to all-time highs, and then the shooting will start after the markets closed.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/stocks-hit-and-crude-gains-choppy-geopolitics-driven-trade-newsquawk-us-market-wrap , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/stocks-slide-oil-surges-iran-war-fears-semi-honey-badger-higher-17th-straight-day

- There’s more to discuss like the Middle East being given swap lines and more money printing, but all of that will manifest as an after effect of losing the war in Iran, so it doesn’t really matter. If Trump wasn’t an Israeli puppet, he would pull out and take the “L” but he won’t because he is.

- The bottom line is that we’re just waiting for the fireworks to (re)start. Let’s get this over with, shall we?

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 23rd, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The US seized more ships, so Iran seized more ships. Iran has currently seized more ships than the US. Also, the top admiral of the Navy abruptly resigned, meaning Trump is probably planning on bringing the aircraft carriers closer to Iran, where they’ll be heavily seasoned with missiles, and the top admiral doesn’t want that blood on his hands. This is hard evidence that Trump is not going to seek an off-ramp and that the big offensive is still on, but the military brass know it’s doomed and are jumping ship.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-seizes-two-ships-hormuz-chokepoint-tehran-received-some-signs-us-ready-end , https://www.aol.com/articles/trump-navy-secretary-resigns-effective-223649714.html

- The Lebanese ceasefire appears to be collapsing, but it’ll probably hold until the weekend when the big offensive (probably) happens. Americans are being advised to depart Lebanon now while the ceasefire holds.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/embassy-tells-americans-still-lebanon-depart-now-while-flights-available-ceasefire

- Are the markets still fake and gay? Of course!
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/stocks-shrug-surging-oil-prices-bitcoin-rips-tehran-turbocharges-tensions-trump

- I’m sorry that this newsletter is so short. It’s just that everything hinges on the Iran War, which would have ended a long time ago if not for Israel, but like I said, this is the hill the Regime will die on because of Israel.

- The bottom line is that the rest of the week is likely to be quiet as the US and Israel prepare for a possible big offensive this weekend. Iran is fully prepared, so we’re waiting for the Regime to initiate the naval offensive that caused the head of the navy to resign in disgust today.

The Morning Constitutional: April 22nd, 2026
https://www.mgtow.tv/watch/the-morning-constitutional-april-22nd-2026_5rzl1YpPMPZHqCa.html
/watch/the-morning-constitutional-april-22nd-2026_5rzl1YpPMPZHqCa.html

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 21st, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- This is how the Iran War went today: Trump claimed Iran was agreeing to more negotiations to prop the markets up, Iran denied it, then the western media claimed that Iran was joking and cited two unnamed Pakistani sources that said Iran is totally going to agree to negotiations, and Iran denied it. At the end of the day, actions speak louder than words, and once the missiles start flying again, it’s going to be pretty obvious there aren’t going to be any more negotiations. I’m a bit surprised that Israel and America didn’t break the ceasefire first, especially Israel, since that’s kind of their signature move. Anyway, the ceasefire expires tomorrow, so let’s get this over with.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-says-no-plans-talks-after-us-seizure-cargo-ship-pakistanis-contradict-oil-prices , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-says-no-plans-talks-after-us-seizure-cargo-ship-pakistanis-contradict-oil-prices , https://x.com/DanielLDavis1/status/2046395846757953595

- The markets are as fake and gay as they ever were. We’ll see what happens tomorrow. If Iran agrees to a ceasefire extension, stocks will go to new all-time highs and oil will fall again. If Iran starts launching missiles again, then the opposite will happen. There is no point speculating or analyzing anything because the Iran War is driving the market, followed closely by Trump’s endless market manipulation.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/oil-jumps-tech-dumps-gold-slumps-blockade-booms-ceasefire-looms , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-stocks-finished-mixed-geopolitics-dominated-headlines-and-conflicting-reports-about-us

- It’s worth pointing out that the damage in the Middle East will already cause a global recession in a few months. Even if the war ended tomorrow with a deal, it’s fucked. Another round of fighting, especially if Iran makes the Middle East uninhabitable and there is a failed ground offensive by the United States, will just add gasoline to the fire that’s already burning under the surface. I’m not losing any sleep missing out on the stock market right now, and you shouldn’t either. The only people making money are the insiders who are illegally trading using insider information and manipulating the market.

- The bottom line is that we’ll see what happens tomorrow. Nothing else to say.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 20th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Trump proposed another round of negotiations in Pakistan with Iran, but Iran said they’re not interested in more meetings until the US is willing to agree with the 10-point conditions. Trump then seized an Iranian cargo carrier that was returning from China (which had left before the blockade towards China and was returning home). The US Navy attacked and seized the merchant vessel, and Iran said that the US has violated the ceasefire and that they are preparing a response. Since there will be no ceasefire extension and the US violated the ceasefire, we’re waiting to see what Iran’s response will be. The US Navy is sitting out of range of Iranian missiles, and its blockade is only effective because merchant ships are so painfully slow that anyone can catch up with them if they want. I predict that Iranian ships will shortly become Chinese or Russian ships, but nothing will otherwise change. The Iranians can’t attack the US Navy directly, and since Navy ships are mobile, they’re not ideal targets for long-range missiles anyway. If I were Iran, I would simply change my merchant vessels from Iran to China or Russia and let them deal with the blockade however they want. Meanwhile, I would hit Israel. That’ll bring the US running back to Israel’s defense to provide missile support, which will put them in range of Iran’s missiles: Bait the trap, lure the prey, spring the trap.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/no-more-mr-nice-guy-trump-sends-witkoff-pakistan-us-iran-talks-hormuz-traffic-freezes

- In a bit of random news, Palantir posted its manifesto, called “The Technological Republic,” on X. Alex Karp is Jewish and supports Israel, but you can read the post and see that he isn’t a death cultist who wants mass sacrifice to fulfill some bullshit prophecy of the Messiah and Greater Israel. Again, the Technocracy is NOT the good guys, but between the death cult Zionists and literal Communists, they’re the least shitty bad guys.
source: https://x.com/PalantirTech/status/2045574398573453312

- The markets are pulling back as the commodities markets open, but I expect Trump to say some bullshit about Iran begging for a ceasefire and agreeing to finger Netanyahu’s asshole as Trump sucks him off, and for stocks to go to new all-time highs. The only thing that will cause markets to realize Trump is obviously lying again is if Iran starts launching missiles again. No missiles means the war is over, and whatever Trump says is close enough to true to bet your life savings on.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/jpmorgans-top-commodity-analyst-shocked-prices-are-falling-nothing-has-improved , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/hartnett-its-bull-trap

- So the bottom line is that the fireworks might restart a day earlier than expected, but it ultimately doesn’t make a difference. The outcome is already fixed. Enjoy the show.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 17th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- Nothing is happening with Iran. As I said, things are going to be quiet and boring until the ceasefire ends next week, then things are going to explode (literally).
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/hegseth-vows-hormuz-blockade-continue-long-it-takes-ships-now-subject-search-outright , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/trumps-blockade-breaking-iran-and-european-elites-are-angry , https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/iran-boasts-it-fast-rebuilding-bridges-rail-lines-after-us-wrought-destruction

- The markets are still fake and gay, breaking new all-time high records even as oil falls more. Paper crude futures are $93 while actual crude oil in Singapore and Sri Lanka is over $200.
source: https://oilprice.com/Energy/Oil-Prices/Whats-Next-for-Oil-Prices44114.html , https://x.com/CheburekiMan/status/2044840486901522833

- The only thing worth mentioning is that there was a meeting in China today between Russian Foreign Minister Lavrov and his Chinese counterpart, Wang Yi, and one interesting statement was that Russia and China are “interested in ensuring” that the West fails to maintain/renew its hegemony. This isn’t a huge deal because it’s just talk, but it confirms the obvious, which is that Russia and China aren’t going to sit on their hands and let the US destroy Iran, Cuba, etc.
source: https://www.facebook.com/MIDRussia/posts/-statement-and-answers-to-media-questions-by-russias-foreign-minister-sergey-lav/1301015472221510/ , https://us.china-embassy.gov.cn/eng/zgyw/202604/t20260416_11893219.htm , https://x.com/Amockx2022/status/2044932854799647078

- So the bottom line is that nothing is likely to happen until the ceasefire expires, so enjoy a peaceful, quiet week and touch grass or something. It’s Spring. Enjoy some warm weather and pollen allergies.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 16th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The markets are still fake and gay.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/deal-or-no-deal-risk-roller-coasters-deal-hope-trumps-hormuz-dead-end , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/whats-behind-meltup-complete-hedge-fund-institutional-and-retail-flow-and-positiong , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-stocks-steadily-rebounded-us-and-iran-talks-remain-ongoing-newsquawk-asia-pac-market , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/goldman-stocks-face-final-battle-hormuz-outcome-decides-game

- Regarding Iran, the Western media is reporting that Iran has agreed to let the US use the Strait of Hormuz for literally nothing as a “face-saving measure” based on literally nothing. Total bullshit.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/war-very-close-over-trump-says-iran-ceasefire-extension-reportedly-advances-more-us

- All the sources I’m seeing are saying that Iran is using the last week of the ceasefire to dig out the collapsed tunnels in its missile cities and prepare for the next phase of the war. They are also excited about the ground invasion because they can do math. Meanwhile, I was right that the US is preparing one massive bombing campaign with all the bombs they’ve pulled from Asia to replenish their supplies to try and accomplish in one day what they couldn’t in 40. My guess (although this isn’t mentioned) is that this will be done to soften defenses against the ground invasion because that’s the only card America can play.
source: https://x.com/RT_com/status/2044598182198616450

- So the bottom line is that the next week is likely to be boring as the Regime manipulates the markets to Hell and back and makes up stories about Iran cucking. I’ll keep my eyes open for updates, but nothing is likely to happen until the ceasefire expires. Maybe Israel will start the party early because they never found a ceasefire they didn’t violate.

The Morning Constitutional: April 15th, 2026
https://www.mgtow.tv/watch/the-morning-constitutional-april-8th-2026_AsUOl7nCeO9Zr6w.html
/watch/the-morning-constitutional-april-8th-2026_AsUOl7nCeO9Zr6w.html

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 14th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- I’m going to keep things short because, aside from developments in the war with Iran, nothing else matters, but we’re still technically in a ceasefire as Trump imposes his blockade of Iran to make double-sure than the oil markets crash (that’ll show em’). So here is the update for today:

- The blockade has begun, and so far, nothing has happened in terms of missiles or explosions. Iran is surely taking this time to repair everything and get their launchers ready to cause another round of “laundry fires” on these ships when the time comes.

- China has said that they are sending its ships to Iran, and they expect America to allow them to pass. They didn’t threaten America, which Trump will take as a sign of weakness. Two Chinese ships were forced to turn around today by the Americans, so the ball is in China’s court to respond. I don’t expect China to attack the blockade with their navy or anything. They’ll most likely impose additional export restrictions on America as a quid pro quo for the US blocking their oil.
source: https://www.reuters.com/world/china/us-military-enforce-blockade-gulf-oman-arabian-sea-note-seafarers-2026-04-13/ , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/oil-tanker-going-china-forced-reverse-course-crossing-hormuz-under-us-blockade

- So that’s the update. The blockade is on. They’ve interfered with China’s trade, and China is being too subtle in their response, which Trump will perceive as weakness and aggress further. Iran has shown the way. If you try diplomacy, you get aggression and war crimes committed against you. If you fuck their shit up, Trump cucks out and begs for a ceasefire. For some reason, Russia and China are still being diplomatic.

- In the markets, the blockade and imminent economic crash have been deemed bullish by Wall Street, causing the S&P 500 to become positive and for oil to fall below $100. How does that make sense? The narrative is that there is “deal hope”, but no, there isn’t. They’re just going to keep manipulating the markets without even the pretext of plausible deniability. If you’re still investing at this point, you already knew the markets were fake and gay.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/deal-or-no-deal-risk-roller-coasters-deal-hope-trumps-hormuz-dead-end , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/whats-behind-meltup-complete-hedge-fund-institutional-and-retail-flow-and-positiong

- So the bottom line is that Iran’s plan to cause an energy crisis to bring down the western economies is being countered by Trump, causing an energy crisis and bringing down the western economies, but the trick is that he’s going to lie about it and manipulate the markets and pretend that manipulating futures prices will make oil supply magically appear from nowhere. It’s a pretty ballsy plan, some might even call it delusional and insane. One might even go as far as to say that this is completely retarded and doesn’t even make sense on paper, but this is what we’re doing, and it’s up to Iran and China to deal with it, or not. Maybe Iran just chills out and lets Trump take credit for causing the energy crisis. Who knows? The ceasefire supposedly ends automatically next week, but I expect things to heat up before then.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 13th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The ceasefire negotiations failed because JD Vance was constantly getting phone calls from Netanyahu, and the negotiations shifted from peace to recognizing Israel, at which point the Iranians walked away, refusing to negotiate with Israel.
source: https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/world/middle-east/how-a-netanyahu-phone-call-to-jd-vance-shifted-focus-in-iran-us-negotiations/articleshow/130216264.cms

- The plan now is so retarded that I’m shocked. Trump is going to blockade the Strait of Hormuz and shut down all oil traffic himself. How does this help? It doesn’t, in fact, it does exactly what Iran was trying to do, which is cause a financial crisis and bring down the economies of America and Europe. What does Trump think he’s doing? The MAGAtards are coping and saying that the blockade is a good thing because it means countries will have to buy American oil. If that was true, why was Trump trying to reopen the Stait or Hormuz for the last 2 months, you copium addicted retard? I think the only way Trump can claim a win is to side with Iran and claim that bringing down the global economy was his idea, since that’s what’s going to happen anyway.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/energy/uae-oil-chief-warns-world-cant-allow-hormuz-closure-2-tankers-u-turn-and-us-emerges-last

- The idea that blockading Middle Eastern oil will benefit Americans is based on American oil companies making more money due to higher prices, but prices will skyrocket for EVERYONE, including Americans, and the economy will crash. We can’t afford $200 oil even if we’re selling it on the other side. Why do you think Trump was lifting sanctions on Russia and manipulating oil for weeks if skyrocketing oil was a good thing for America? These people are so high on copium that they don’t even hear how stupid they sound to everyone else.

- I hope you guys have been taking my advice and preparing your disaster prep because you’re going to see massive shortages, followed by massive price increases in the next few weeks and into the rest of the year for the foreseeable future. There is no way out of this unless we cut Israel loose and leave it to its fate.

- In the markets, now that the commodities markets are open after the weekend, oil is back above $100. Soon, $100 is going to seem cheap.

- So the bottom line is that I don’t know what Trump’s next move is. I can’t predict stupidity. Blockading Iran and reinforcing their closure of Hormuz was not on the Bingo Card. Either launch the ground invasion and exhaust the missiles you’ve taken from Asia so we can get this over with, or remove Trump and have JD Vance do something.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 10th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- I was genuinely worried yesterday when Iran went forward with the negotiations after Israel attacked Lebanon and Trump lied about what he agreed to. I thought for sure Iran would just cancel everything and go back to bombing the shit out of the gathering troops in the region (now up to 50,000). It looked like Iran was making the same mistake as the last two times and cucking. There were rumors of some liberal politicians who were intentionally spared from assassination by the Regime, orchestrating a soft coup and surrendering to the Regime. It looks like those fears weren’t realized. The negotiations were cancelled due to Israel, but Iran hasn’t returned to attacking US forces in the region yet. They are telling the US to control Israel and that any negotiations will involve the entire Axis of Resistance, not just Iran. We’ll know the negotiations have truly ended once the US and Iran begin bombing each other again. Iran is allowing the US to gather their ground invasion forces without attacking them, but Iran must have a plan for that, perhaps luring them into a trap.

- The US is rearming using massive airlifts during the ceasefire, as expected. The only scenario that makes sense is that Iran wants the US to launch the ground invasion so they can defeat and embarrass them. We’re only talking 50,000 troops. To put that in perspective, nearly 200,000 troops participated on D-Day during WW2 against 50,000 Germans. This time, it will be 50,000 Americans against hundreds of thousands of Iranians fighting defensively. If you know anything about warfare, the side on the offense takes triple the casualties of the defenders, which is why it took 200,000 Allied troops to defeat 50,000 Germans on D-Day. You literally need 4X the number to realistically win. The only way the US wins with a force of 50,000 is if Iran only has 12,500 soldiers or so to fight them. The IRGC alone (not to mention the Iranian military, just the IRGC) has 10X that number.

- One final note regarding Iran. The new Supreme Leader (the son of the previous one) had made no appearances and only one written statement since the beginning of the war, and a lot of people speculated that he was dead because he wasn’t saying or doing anything, but it turns out that he was in a 40-day religious mourning period. You know how in the Bible people would fast and pray for 40 days, and it had deep religious significance. Well, apparently, that’s where he’s been. He’s been mourning his father and family and preparing himself spiritually to lead his people, which is actually kind of wholesome. The 40-day mourning period just ended.

- So the bottom line regarding the war is that Iran isn’t cucking (much to my relief) but does seem to be deliberately allowing the US to prepare their ground invasion without resistance by playing along with the ceasefire. This does appear to be planned and intentional because Iran has no reason to cuck and beg for peace.

- Moving onto the markets:

- The markets soared based on “Hormuz Hope” despite nothing happening and the negotiations going nowhere. Like I said before, normies don’t respond to reality, only the TV. Only when the TV reports on it does it become real, so as long as the normies are being told Trump won and Iran is negotiating, they’re going to take that as a positive regardless of what’s really happening.
source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/hormuz-hope-sparks-stocks-longest-win-streak-6-months-bonds-bullion-bitcoin-bid , https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/us-stocks-extended-ceasefire-gains-israel-and-lebanon-said-hold-negotiations-next-week

- Oil is back below $100, with all blends of oil crashing 11-19% in a single day. Won’t they be surprised when the obvious and telegraphed thing happens?

- Not much else to talk about. The markets are at the mercy of the Iran war, and the war is in an intermission at the moment as the Regime rearms and Iran prepares for the ground invasion. I also heard a rumor that this was all China’s idea, and China encouraged Iran to go along with the ceasefire. Why? Because all the weapons that the Regime is using to rearm for the ground invasion are coming from Asia. These were the weapons that America was planning to use against China. The Regime has to consolidate all the weapons it still has to have a chance against Iran, so it makes sense for China to want Iran to allow it to happen. Iran is a nation of mountain fortresses that are impervious to air strikes, whereas China is full of vulnerable cities and delicate industrial infrastructure, which is highly vulnerable to missiles and airstrikes. Nothing would make China happier than for Iran to absorb these missile strikes and exhaust the United States into submission. It’s literally the best possible theater that BRICS could ask for.

- The bottom line is that the ground invasion has been postponed for a week or two, but it’s happening. The Technocrats are accusing Trump of having dementia and calling for him to be impeached and replaced by JD Vance, all according to plan. I’m glad to see my fears of Iran being betrayed and cucking were misplaced, and I’m excited to see what the new leader does now that his 40-day mourning period is done, since I know nothing about him, so getting into his head and adding him to my internal mental model will be fun and interesting.

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 9th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- The ceasefire is basically over. The Strait of Hormuz is closed again, and Trump said the 10 points he agreed to are trash. The US tricked Iran into agreeing to a ceasefire so they can rearm, and Iran is playing along while only attacking Israel for some reason. The UAE attacked Iran, so the fighting didn’t stop. I’m concerned about Iran still moving forward with the planned negotiations in Pakistan despite the obvious bad faith of the US. I guess they need to be betrayed a third time in a row for some reason. I don’t think they’re cucking though, at least not yet.
source: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/apr/08/pakistan-us-israel-iran-ceasefire

- In Technocrat news, Tucker Carlson and Joe Kent are warning that Israel is controlling Trump and that Trump is leaving NATO to attack Turkey on behalf of Israel. Also, Trump threatened the Pope, like the actual Pope of the Catholic church. This is significant because, according to Kash Patel’s Mossad-assigned girlfriend, the Catholic church is somehow involved with the Technocrats in ways that I don’t fully understand, other than that they aren’t Zionists. Anyway, threatening the Pope wasn’t on my Bingo card. JD Vance is a Catholic, BTW, so the plot thickens regarding the Technocrats.

- There isn’t much else to talk about. I’m unsure what Iran is doing playing along with the negotiations. The markets rallied on the ceasefire for obvious reasons and are optimistic that the war is over, despite the missiles flying. The reason is simple: the markets don’t follow reality; they follow the TV. The TV says Trump won and Iran surrendered, so that’s why the market reacted. If the TV notifies the normies that Trump lied, then the markets will reverse. It’s actually shocking how blindly the markets continue to trust Trump after so many lies, but c’est la vie.

- The winners in the market today were:
o 1. Crypto
o 2. Industrials
o 3. Materials
o 4. Bitcoin
o 5. Information Technology
o 6. Consumer Discretionary
o 7. Financials

- The losers in the market today were:
o 1. The VIX
o 2. Brent Crude Oil
o 3. WTI Crude Oil
o 4. Natural Gas
o 5. Broad Commodities
o 6. Energy
o 7. The US Dollar

- I’m not sure why I’m even mentioning the markets since they’re just being manipulated by Trump’s lies and bullshit.

- So the bottom line is that Trump lied and tricked Iran into agreeing to a ceasefire, and he’s not doing anything he promised, so I don’t know what Iran is waiting for. Why are they playing along with this? They’re giving the impression that they’re cucking, but why would they do that when they were winning? Am I missing something? I’m seeing a lot of theories floating around social media, ranging from a tactical consideration to betrayal by government insiders. We’ll just have to see what happens.

The Morning Constitutional: April 8th, 2026
https://www.mgtow.tv/watch/2026-04-08-08-00-46_nI7CVTGYBl1lzRF.html
/watch/2026-04-08-08-00-46_nI7CVTGYBl1lzRF.html

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 7th, 2026

Tonight’s the night. The Regime is running out of missiles globally, and they’re launching their big attack. The ground invasion will almost certainly coincide with the bombing campaign. If the dust settles and Iran stands, I expect nukes to be used. No point talking about anything else, including the markets, because everything will be decided on the battlefield.

However, since I don’t want you to feel like I’m being lazy tonight, let’s talk about MeshCore/Meshtastic. These are technologies that allow you to use your smartphone to send and receive text messages without a network. Each device acts as a repeater, so the more people on the network, the faster and longer the range it is. It can’t be shut down by the government because there is no central hub; the entire network is distributed. The Regime promoted this technology for Iranian protestors earlier this year to get around Iran shutting the internet down during the coup attempt. That’s how powerful this technology is, and it’s not expensive. The apps are free, just search for “MeshCore” or “Meshtastic” in the app store. Those are two different networks with pros and cons, but we’ll talk about that later.

As far as hardware, a basic unit costs about $20 if you want to DIY it yourself and flash the drive. If you want a ready-made solution that works out of the box, it’s about $30. The unit I’m linking to is a two-pack for $65. Why two units? Well, you can keep one in your house and one in your car, or you could flash one for MeshCore and one for Meshtastic so that you have access to both networks. It’s up to you.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0F1CYWVLC

MeshCore/Meshtastic has its own community similar to ham radio operators, but they’re great not only for disaster preparation but if you’re an outdoor guy and like to camp in places where your cellphone doesn’t get good service, MeshCore/Meshtastic can be more reliable than a cellphone provider, and unlike something like Starlink, the units are small, cheap, and have no fees. You are the network.

The main difference between Meshtastic and MeshCore is how the traffic is forwarded. MeshCore is a newer and more reliable technology, so if you’re starting a network from scratch, go with MeshCore. However, Meshtastic has a lot of large established networks due to it being an older protocol, so if you’re looking to join a larger and more established network so that your devices have a longer range, Meshtastic might be better. Again, you can have both if you get the two-pack and install MeshCore on one device and Meshtastic on the other. Then you can switch between the two apps on your phone and use the one that works for you at that time.

MeshCore and Meshtastic may not be appropriate for everyone. If you’re going to be a wasteland warlord or operate in only a small group, a walkie-talkie might be all you need. However, walkie-talkies don’t scale well to larger organizations, which is where these other technologies fit in. There are lots of YouTube channels dedicated to the MeshCore/Meshtasic hobby and community, but you don’t have to become an expert to get started and have your communications infrastructure in place. Being able to communicate with your loved ones in an emergency when cell service is offline is priceless.

That’s all I’m going to talk about tonight. There’s no point talking about the markets or anything because it’s all going to be decided on the battlefield. See you tomorrow!

Monkey’s Market Minute: April 6th, 2026

Disclaimer: Never take investment advice from strangers on the internet, especially monkeys. Learn how to manage your own money or seek out a professional who can give you personalized financial services. This newsletter is just my thoughts and opinions, and if you copy me and lose the money, you have nobody to blame but yourself.

- I’ll be taking a break from the prep segment until I see something worth sharing. It won’t be a daily segment any longer, but more of a “here’s something I found that’s interesting that I haven’t mentioned before” thing.

- Supposedly Trump is going to destroy all the energy infrastructure in Iran in 24 hours, after which Iran will make the Middle East uninhabitable, even for Israel. I fully expect Trump to declare another round of negotiations and delay the promised attack until Friday, but we’ll see.
source: https://x.com/Phoxotic/status/2040960218071285799

- The plane that was shot down was resolved. According to western media, the pilot was saved and the planes that were destroyed weren’t shot down but were “stuck in sand” and the US blew them up themselves to prevent them from being captured. However, Iran has pictures of bodies in the planes, which wouldn’t make sense if they were stuck in sand and abandoned. It doesn’t really matter as the details of the rescue change literally nothing.
source: https://x.com/visionergeo/status/2040851407742660616 , https://x.com/MaxtheCrowhouse/status/2040937538970402979

- Iran released a video showing the new supreme leader in front of a monitor in an operations room with an image of Israel’s Demona nuclear facility and its coordinates, obviously as a warning that if Trump attacks their energy, they’re going to take out Demona.
source: https://x.com/realgerhardtvdm/status/2040967513471844629

- Ground invasion soon maybe? We’ll see.

- As far as the markets go, oil is around $110 The markets will likely be down as Trump seems to have given up trying to lie about the war being over since nobody believes him anyway.

- The bottom line is we’re still waiting on the ground invasion.